15 Sep 2014
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Judy Judy: The Polls Have Closed

Alameda native and Patch Contributor Judy Judy ("I married Mr. Judy, that's why") gives us a piece of her quirky mind Fridays on Patch.

Unless aliens abducted you, you're well aware of the great debate that has been brewing on the Island and here on Alameda Patch.

By now you've probably read all the information for and against and, if you're anything like me, you've even read all the individual comments on this site. (She read all those crazy comments? You bet I did. Every last one of ‘em!)

Though it was not an easy decision to make, I made my choice and I feel it was educated and thoughtful. I am confident and secure with my decision and it is a definite: I go left. 

Wait, what did you think I was talking about? ? Bah. I'm talking about the heated discussion regarding , duh!

When the  by editor Eve Pearlman and a friend, Karen, I was like, “Dude, I can plot two friends against each other over nothing? Sa-weet!”

Oh, um, yeah, what I meant to say was that I thought, “I will do all that I can to help solve this extremely important issue facing the Island and my two friends while hopefully making their bond stronger.” 

It didn't take much research before I was like, “Alex, I got this: ‘What is turning RIGHT for 1,000!’” But after further study, right was definitely wrong.

I do most of my shopping at Trader Joe’s, and since they opened about eight years ago, I’ve been turning right. That’s a lot of research! It took this article to shed light on the error of my ways.

Since on Patch, I’ve tried turning both ways numerous times and even though every cell in my being wants to continue turning right, it is logically the wrong choice. It’s like Trader Joe’s has set the entire store up to be navigated from left to right. Bottles and canned goods are toward the left while bread and fresh produce are on the right. What else needs to be said? It’s like they’ve done it like this on purpose!

Well, they haven’t. I called our local store and talked to Ryan. He told me that the Alameda TJ’s is set up for customers to flow through it from right to left. The flowers come first, luring us in. Once through the doors, the colors, smells and textures of the fresh produce to the right keep us busy until we hit the frozen foods and free samples in the middle. Top that off with a $2 bottle of wine on the left. Bam! They’ve got us; customers for life.

Wooah, slow down! You just hold on a second, Ryan! If a checker threw my bread and tomatoes on the bottom of the bag, just to cover them with cans of tuna and bottles of juice, I’d quickly become the new Mayor of Crazytown. And fresh flowers? Why would I put them in my cart first if you wouldn’t put them in my bag first Ryan? Preposterous!

In conclusion, there isn't one. Eve and Karen, you’re both right, or both wrong, depending on how you look at it. Obviously, the only way to settle this once and for all is with a dance-off. That's right, you heard me, a dance-off. Take a gander at the videos I've posted, pick a day and time, and we'll meet in the frozen foods section. Don't worry, I'll be the judge. And, you're welcome!  

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