Self Sabotage

You've done so well, you look so good.  You've lost almost all the weight you needed to lose and have been exercising on a regular basis.  You not only look good but you FEEL good.  Only 10 more lbs. to go and you've reached your goal.  Won't everyone be proud of you?  Aren't you proud of yourself?  Are you? Or is there a little devil on your shoulder just waiting to whisper sweet nothings into your ear at the moment when you feel most vulnerable?  When we're so close to our goals, why do we self sabotage ourselves?

So, you've been there, on your way home from work, alone.  You stop at the grocery store because your husband or wife tells you that you need to buy milk.  So you go to the store and you walk in and go down the aisle to get to the milk.  You proceed to the checkout only to pass the snack aisle, thinking to yourself "nobody would know, so why not"?  You tell yourself, no, I'm stronger than that! So as you stand there at the checkout counter feeling extremely proud of yourself for not giving into temptation you lock eyes with the sweet caramel goodness of the chocolate bars staring you right in the face.  You begin to hear the soft voice in your ear whispering "I could eat it in the car, hide the wrapper under the seat and nobody would know". 

Doesn't sound like you? How about this.  You're cleaning your child's room and you find a bag of gummy bears in the toy chest.  After you think about how long they've been in there and what your child possibly could have done to them, what happens next?  Something happens to you right?  You actually begin to have a conflict with yourself and here's how it generally goes down. Devil: Wow, I could actually eat this whole bag of gummy bears and nobody would find out about it.  Angel: Yea, but that would be really gross, besides you don't want to mess up your diet, you're doing so well! Devil: No, I'm not doing well, I'll always be a mess, overweight and unhappy with myself, what's one bag of gummy bears going to do, right? Angel: How could you say that? You have such determination and you've come so far.  Don't ruin what you've worked so hard for.  So who wins this argument?  Or should I say, who do you let win?   

Overeaters tend to have these types of situations come up all the time.  We wrestle with "ourselves" constantly.  This same behavior is why we became overweight in the first place.  We justify our damaging behavior by simply saying to ourselves that we are not worth the effort.  That is, until we start to listen to the Angel again if you will.  Something inside you made you put that Twinkie down the first day of your diet and pick up an apple instead.  That's called willpower.  It didn't go away, it just took a brief vacation.  Sometimes it's a positive influence like looking at that pink bikini hanging up on a hanger in your closet, maybe it's shame or a combination of both.  Whatever it takes to bring it back is ok, just know that it will come back. 

As the Queen of self sabotaging behavior, here are some tricks I have learned to keep myself on track and to flick that little guy off my shoulder.  First of all I never, ever shop when I'm hungry.  How can I do that if I haven't eaten dinner yet and I'm in the store you ask?  Keep things like granola bars, bags of carrots and nuts in your purse.  If you eat things like this before dinner it won't ruin your diet and you won't end up talking to yourself in the middle of the supermarket.  It's a given to have healthy things at home.  When you're all alone at home and you find yourself in a sticky situation (no pun intended), let your willpower kick in.  Keep reminding yourself how far you've come and think of the overweight you.  Do you really want to become that person again?  Are those snacks really worth it?  Oh and the next time you're in the grocery store and you see me having a nice little chit chat with myself, just keep on walking - I know how crazy it looks!