He’s such a good active listener he shares dog whistle jokes with Chihuahuas. He can make a pit bull smile. When hockey players lose their teeth, he cries. He once visited Mississippi in search of a toothy smile… When a tooth is extracted, he can hear it scream. He understands women make 80% of family healthcare choices and doesn’t even care that women usually live 5-10 years longer than men. He openly supports a woman becoming USC’s next head football coach…especially if she replaces Lane Kiffin. The Dalai Lama most easily finds peace and serenity sitting in his dental chair. Grown men cry when he sings “Friends in low Places”…to a spittoon. His hands are so gentle paraffin has been known to lose its confidence. When he smiles, clouds disappear; his patients can actually smell the roses. His voice is so reassuring that after speaking with former President Richard Millhouse Nixon, Nixon finally conceded, “Okay, I give up, I’m a crook.” Wisdom teeth go to him for second opinions. He knows women are smarter than men and that makes him the smartest elite athlete/scribe/DDS-type in the world. He once gave respect to Rodney Dangerfield. He’s never met Oprah, but he knows it was Stedman’s fault. White Men Can’t Jump actress Rosie Perez once said, “Sometimes when you win you actually lose. Sometimes when you lose you actually win and sometimes you don’t even win or lose.” On meeting him, Rosie was quoted sharing, “When I listen to him listening to me, I always win.” When Sarah Palin killed a moose with an automatic weapon shot from a helicopter, she was asked to leave the practice…after he released the hounds. He once said something nice about Rush Limbaugh. Birds suddenly appear when he walks by. He is the kindest, gentlest, and most sensitive dentist in the world. “I don’t always get the chance to straighten crooked teeth, but when I do, I prefer Invisalign.