BLOG: If I Were You I Would Vote For Me...

NOTE: Patch blogs are opinion pieces by local writers. Click here to blog on Patch. 

This was most of my opening speech at the Dixon Chamber of Commerce candidates forum televised live night last  Thursday night….

"If I were you I would vote for me because I am, and have been for years, the "go-to" guy for a lot of people in this community. I just figured as long as I’m getting all this stuff done, all the time for people, I might as well get hired by the voters and to do the same thing. I’m not telling you NOT to vote for your favorite person, just asking that if you do, just give me your second vote. There are two open seats and no incumbents…So with Ceremello gone off the council we need a much tamer version of him just to stimulate that "outside the box" thinking that I invented 30 years before he came lumbering on the scene.

Should Ceremello win I, believe it or not, can work with him too. All of the others that can win will be a pleasure with which to work. We need a cohesive unit of elected officials to solve many of the future problems facing this community.

My first wife Linda and I have handed out over 1,000 campaign bookmarks door-to-door so far. We don’t knock and bother you because we hate to be bothered at home by want-to-be politicians. If we see you we stop and talk if you want, but that’s it. We bother anyone at all during the Giants, 49ers or Raiders games.

My simple message is on the bookmark. We will try our best to get to your house (if you are a registered voter) but I pulled a hip flexor muscle a couple of weeks ago on the bike and its cut my walking speed waaay down…But we’ll be limping your way so stop us and say "Hi" if you get a chance.

Having been elected (not appointed) three different times by the public and have served 12 years total (two as vice mayor) I know what goes where and why. Not being obligated to any employer or organization leaves me in the enviable position to always do what’s in the best interest of the public without having to worry about any social or financial repercussions. So it’s like I’m applying for a job asking you to look at my resume and compare it to all of the others."

I didn’t even ask for the endorsement of the Solano County real estate group (NSCAR) of which I am a member. During their interview process they ask if I was asking for their endorsement or any money. I said no. If they wanted to endorse me based on my views on serving the overall community they could…if not, that was all right too…But I wouldn’t run as their man. They said I sounded like I wasn’t proud to be a realtor. I said I wasn’t running to represent the realtors but the citizens of Dixon…guess who they didn’t endorse and instead gave some of my dues money to some other candidates in this race. I loaned myself $500 for the campaign and asked for no money or endorsements from any organization…I owe no pay back to anyone but the public…and that’s just the way it is.

Having just finished serving two years as a Dixon American Legion Post 208 Vice Commander, I like what one of the American Legion guys said when someone told him I had either said or written something they didn’t like. He said, "For $#&%’s sake he’s not asking you to go have a beer, he’s just asking for your vote. He’s one guy that when you ask for something to get done…it gets done. While others talk about what they "will do" he has a long list of things he "has done" for this community, its vets and its people. He a friend of the veteran’s, taxpayers and the voters and deserves our support. The only thing that separates the candidates is those who have actually done things, as opposed to those who talk about what they will do. When Ted gives his word he keeps it."

Just In Case I Leave Unexpectedly.

Ted: From the email bag…As I approach my late-sixties, I am struck by the inevitability that the party must end. And one clear, cold morning after I'm gone, my wife will awaken in the warmth of our bedroom and she will be struck with the pain of learning that sometimes there isn't "anymore". No more hugs, no more special moments to celebrate together, no more phone calls just to chat, no more "just one more minute."

Sometimes, what we care about the most gets all used up and goes away, never to return before we can say good-bye, say "I love you." So while we have it, its best we love it, care for it, fix it when it's broken and heal it when it's sick. This is true for marriage.....and old cars, and children with bad report cards, and dogs with bad hips and aging parents and grandparents. We keep them because they are worth it, because we are worth it.

Some things we keep -- like a best friend who moved away or a sister-in-law after divorce. There are just some things that make us happy no matter what…There are things in life that are important like people we know who are special. And so, we keep them close!

Suppose one morning you never wake up, do all your friends know how you really feel? The important thing is to let every one of your friends know your true feelings, even if you think they don't　 love you back….So, just in case I'm gone tomorrow, can I ask you for one last thing? Will you please let everyone know your my feelings and ask them to vote against Obama…H. B. Phoenix (my cousin).

Don’t Step On The Ducks…True Story

Three women die together in an accident and go to heaven. When they get there, St. Peter says, 'we only have one rule here in heaven: Don't step on the ducks!'
So they enter heaven, and sure enough, there are ducks all over the place. It is almost impossible not to step on a duck, and although they try their best to avoid them, the first woman accidentally steps on one. Along comes St. Peter with the ugliest man she ever saw. St. Peter chains them together and says, 'Your punishment for stepping on a duck is to spend eternity chained to this ugly man!' The next day, the second woman steps accidentally on a duck and along comes St. Peter, who doesn't miss a thing. With him is another extremely ugly man. He chains them together with the same admonishment as for the first woman. The third woman has observed all this and, not wanting to be chained for all eternity to an ugly man, is very, VERY careful where she steps.

She manages to go months without stepping on any ducks, but One day St. Peter comes up to her with the most handsome man she has ever laid eyes on...Very tall, long eyelashes, muscular. St. Peter chains them together without saying a word. The happy woman says, 'I wonder what I did to deserve being chained to you for all of eternity?'　 The guy says, 'I don't know about you, but I stepped on a duck. ' Just in time for the Holiday Season; Another True Story. I guess I'm just a softie…these romantic stories always get to me…

This is a love story kinda brings a tear to your eye! A couple was Christmas shopping at the Solano Mall last Christmas Eve and the mall was packed. As the wife walked through the mall she was surprised to look up and see her husband was nowhere around. She was quite upset because they had a lot to do. Because she was so worried, she called him on her cell phone to ask　him where he was. In a calm voice, the husband said, "Honey, you remember the jewelry store we went into about five years ago where you fell in love with that diamond necklace that we could not afford and I told you that I would get it for you one day?" The wife choked up and started to cry and said, "Yes, I remember that jewelry store." He said, "Well, I'm in the bar right next to it."