Is It Time for Your Checkup? Get Your Legal Ducks in a Row

I'm not talking about your yearly physical checkup or dental exams ladies. I'm talking about your legal checkup.

As Single Moms, each of you came to this point by a different road.  Some were divorced after many years of marriage, some sadly were widowed, and more and more these days, some were never married to the father or fathers of their children and that means that no legal actions were taken when they broke up—that is very scary.

For the sake of your family, all Single Moms should have their legal "ducks" in a row.  It takes time and patience but it is worth it. If your court paperwork is over five years old, it is possible that laws have changed and you should probably have a Family Law Attorney review your paperwork to see if or how those changes affect your situation. 

If you don't have any legal paperwork stating all of the basics like child support, child custody, visitation rights and schedules, insurance responsibilities, etc., you may be cheating your family not to mention you are probably tired of badgering the father for money every month, if he is still in the picture that is. This is where networking can be a lifesaver.  

Everywhere you go each day you encounter other Single Moms.  It could be dropping your kids off at school, or in the coffee shop you hang out in; heck it's probable that some of your neighbors are Single Moms.  Start networking and talking to them, see if they can recommend a Family Law Attorney that they trust and who is affordable. 

You can call the California State Bar Association and get the names of all the Family Law Attorneys in La Mesa.  You can start calling and asking if any of them offer free consultations to review your situation and answer questions.  You can even call the Superior Court in San Diego, Family Law Division, and see what they recommend.  

Maybe for Christmas, birthday or Mother's Day you can start asking for $20 from your siblings & friends.  You can save that money for attorney costs if it turns out you need legal work done.  We are all on tight budgets and can use all of the help we can get, right?

All I'm saying is that the business of running your family also means making sure that any legal loose ends are tied up, just in case, God forbid anything unexpected were to happen.  You have to understand what the laws of California are and how they affect your situation and children to make sure you are protecting your family. 

I encounter women all the time who say they are too scared to take an ex to court to mandate financial responsibilities because the ex would get mad.  OK, so he gets mad—his problem.

I have to believe that if the father would have stayed in the relationship, they would have participated in the financial responsibilities along with the well being of their children, right?  And they wouldn't treat it as a choice, or am I just naive?

I swear that I'm not trying to lecture you.  I just want to make you aware of things that might have an impact on you and the life of your children.  So it is worth making some calls. 

If you are one of those organized Superwomen that have taken care of all of these details, I salute you....  You are much smarter than I ever was.

Stay strong