MomsTalk Q&A: Are your kids afraid of fireworks?

Q:  Our family loves to celebrate the Fourth of July, but my 5-year-old son can never make it through the fireworks show. We always go to my in-law’s block party where their neighbor puts on a little fireworks show. My son can never make it through; he always runs away scared. He is sometimes scared of loud noises, but not overly so. Any idea how to help him conquer this fear?

A:  No offense to the folks out there offering amateur pyrotechnic displays, but I gotta say……..Whoa!!! I am siding with your son on this one!

Heck, I myself am terrified of "Lefty", the guy at the end of our block with his annual stash of firecrackers and M-80s!  Wanna guess how he came by that nickname?

It may not be the loud noise at all frightening your son. It may be the anticipation he feels wondering if Grandpa’s friend is going to catch on fire or blow his fingers off!

I’m all for celebrating “old school” when it comes to the 4^th of July.  Hot dogs, watermelon and Jello salad, count me in!  However, at the risk of sounding like a total stick-in-the-mud, you have to put safety first when it comes to fireworks. I suggest you make your way to a professional fireworks show to see if your son would have a better experience.  

Nate, my 6-year-old son, is on the autistic spectrum and has loads of sensory issues. The enjoyment of fireworks has been a journey for him, but one worth taking. Dealing with loud noises is a good skill for any child to have.

Loud fireworks can be disturbing even for typical kids. If it is truly just the noise of the fireworks that is causing your son to bolt, I think you should attempt to work it through with him. 

Consider having him wear a pair of earplugs or even some noise-cancelling headphones during the show.  Sit with him in your lap and cover his ears with your hands.  Verbally cue him throughout the show so that he knows when the next one will go off.

Try viewing them from a bit farther out from the crowd where the noise will be dissipated.  We used to camp out our van in the parking lot for the show and the kids loved being able to sit in the trunk!

For us, it has taken several years of work for Nate to really love the firework show. He still covers his ears up, but he loves to see all the beautiful colors in the sky.  He feels accomplished that he has learned to cope with the loud bangs and can regulate himself.  

We are excited that we can now enjoy the show with our whole family together. I hope the same will be true for you this year!

That’s my story and I’m sticking to it!