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Lip Balm Containing Pot Ingredient Thrown Out at Air Base

A satirical look at current events!

Lip Balm Containing Pot Ingredient Thrown Out at Air Base: Air Force officials say they had to discard around 400 tubes of lip balm that were distributed at an air base in Alaska after they were found to contain trace amounts of THC, an active ingredient in marijuana.

Wow, sounds like the Air Force is on a major “balming raid.” Who knew lip balm was a threat to national security? Luckily for our troops, the THC in the lip balm was discovered by a “joint” military task force. Now the big question is, should we consider moving against balmy weather too?

But I fully understand the danger. Why I just put on some lip balm and now I find I can’t stop repeating phrases like “totally bro.” Don’t “Bogart” that Chapstick my friend. Now, if I can just figure out how to get this Chapstick to stay lit.

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