It surprises me today that some people still utilize some of these methods to
deal with their heartache. Here are just a few of the more common myths.
1. It just takes time.
Time only numbs you out of the pain that remains within you. Eventually, the pain may surface - physical illness, migraine, anxiety, stress, depression. When you do the inner work, your pain may decrease.
2. Get another, forget about the past, move on.
When you try to replace the heartache with a new loved one, you just take your unfinished communications and grief issues with you to your next relationship. Sometimes we get used to the unhappy relationships we are in and they become our definition of "normal." We settle for a level of happiness not knowing that there is more available to us.
3. I'll keep busy so I don't have to think about it.
This may be a form of avoidance. We put our energy into staying busy - maybe working longer hours, spending more time shopping. The longer we avoid the issue, the more difficult it becomes to stuff it. It's like trying to hold a beach ball under water. Eventually it will pop to the surface anyway.
4. There's something wrong with me, I shouldn't feel this way.
Grief is the normal and natural response to heartache. Our society doesn't teach people how to deal with grief and our parents may not have had the tools to share with us. When we stop judging ourselves and our feelings, we allow the grief to move through us in a healthier way. Allow yourself to grieve, release the old and welcome the new.
Life is precious and unpredictable and yet we often take it for granted that we will have tomorrow. You have the opportunity to take action for yourself. On Thursday, November 7, 2013, we will be offering a complimentary teleconference, "Helping You Through the Holidays." You will learn tools and techniques that really work and have an opportunity to share and receive valuable feedback for your unique situation. To join us on this call, send an email to: info@staffordlifecoaching.com and we will send you the call-in number and access code.
Everyone has grief issues at some point in their life. Courageous people ask for assistance.
Irene Stafford
Transformational Life Coach
www.staffordlifecoaching.com
www.fromeartachetohappiness.com
This post was contributed by a community member. The views expressed here are the author's own.
The views expressed in this post are the author's own. Want to post on Patch?