Joe Peep's in Valley Village Proudly Serves Up Delicious, Calorific Pizza

Pizza is not supposed to be healthy.

I’m at talking to Marvin, the young man behind the counter, about their famously-unapologetic, unhealthy pizzas.

“Are they really 5,969 calories like it says on the menu?” I ask him.  I imagine the chefs meticulously weighing every topping and measuring every square inch of dough on their prototype pizza to get the most precise calorie calculation.

Well, he says, it’s actually just a rough estimate of their House Combo pizza, which is topped with pepperoni, sausage, Canadian bacon, meatballs and veggies. 

“Pizza’s not supposed to be healthy!”, he jokes, and I tell him I agree.

Some might say we’re wrong -- the USDA’s new nutritional rules for school lunches count frozen pizza as a serving of vegetables, thanks to the two tablespoons of tomato paste it contains (botanically speaking, tomatoes are fruits, but I’m straying off-topic.). If I was looking for a healthy meal, I’d reach for a salad. 

On this particular night I’m too lazy to cook dinner, and Joe Peep’s is always my go-to supper spot when I’m not feelin’ it in the kitchen. Their menu boasts a sense of humor that only encourages me to come back for more: “Baked ZITI (like Lasagna, only different…???)” is one of my favorites: at $12.49 for the dinner option, the meal includes a robust garden salad (artichoke hearts, tomatoes, plenty of olives and mushrooms) and garlic bread. One order always serves my husband and I dinner two nights in a row. When we’re not as hungry, we’ll order the not-as-calorific thin-crust Blue Collar pizza (“buy the ‘Blue Collar’ for the kids and get the good one for yourself!” says their menu). 

The restaurant is known to deliver to nearly any location ("except IRAQ!", states their menu). Their wall boasts U.S.P.S. Express Mail deliveries to Oklahoma, Chicago and Texas. 

"I wonder how they kept the pizza hot," I stupidly mused out loud during one visit. The woman at the counter laughed. We deliver it frozen, she told me. "Don't worry," she said. "You're not the first person who's said that!"

Yes, there is a reason why Joe Peep’s was as the North Hollywood area's No. 1 pizza. I’ve been a loyal lover of the pizzeria ever since I moved into Valley Village last October. After a long, exhausting morning of cleaning the old apartment and moving into the new one, our moving crew (my husband, family, a friend and I) headed to the closest place for lunch that looked like it could feed an army. We spotted the pizza place around the corner and it was love at first bite.

When you stand outside on the sidewalk of Magnolia Boulevard looking into their kitchen through the tall windows, you’ll quickly realize there’s no way to go in.  To your left, there’ll be a pot shop; to the right is .  But the door to Joe Peep’s? You’ll need to head to the back entrance – Look for the giant “Kilroy was here” doodle above the door and you’ll know you’re at the right place.

As you enter, you’ll walk through the narrow hallway and notice the “art” on the white walls – there’s writing on the wall ranging from graffiti lettering to everyday notes to visitor’s signatures.

Their famous walls started out with two chalkboards on the wall where customers would doodle and write, Marvin tells me. When people started coloring outside of the lines, the boss said to let them keep drawing. I’m assuming “the boss” is “Joe,” whom I see every time I stop in and can be seen in a photo on the wall titled, “Who’s the boss?”

Now, Marvin says, customers who haven’t visited in years will come back to see if their writing is still there.  He always has to break the news that it’s been painted over – Joe Peep’s closes one day a year, Thanksgiving, and that’s the day they re-paint the walls white. But by the next week, says Marvin, the walls will be back back to normal and covered with art all over again.

Joe Peep's is located at 12460 Magnolia Blvd., Valley Village. Business hours are Monday to Thursday from 11 a.m. to 10 p.m., Fridays and Saturdays from 11 a.m. to midnight and Sundays from noon to 10 p.m.