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TOP THREE THINGS NOT TO SAY TO A WOMAN WITH CANCER

TOP THREE THINGS NOT TO SAY TO A WOMAN WITH CANCER

The Nancy Yeary Women’s Cancer Research Foundation (NYWCRF) unwrapped Julie Bright’s birthday gift! To celebrate her recent birthday, her family and friends donated to the Foundation, which helps fund the clinical trials and research that have helped women like Bright battle ovarian and other gynecologic cancers. Bright matched their gifts resulting in a total donation of $3755.

“Their gift is very symbolic in that they are investing in research that helps improve cure rates for women with ovarian, uterine, endometrial, cervical and other gynecological cancers,” said Janet Rae, executive director of the Foundation. “Julie is an inspiration with her kind heart, positive outlook and genuine smile and laughter. We were thrilled to celebrate Julie’s big day with her and her loved ones.”

Even though Bright has gone through two major surgeries and been on chemotherapy treatments since September 2005, she maintains a humorous and hopeful outlook on living with ovarian cancer.

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“I’m here today because of the research and resulting treatments I’ve received from my physician, Dr. Jeb Brown,” she said. “What’s next for me is that I keep working with my medical team and enjoying to the fullest the wonderful life God has given me.”

Here are Bright’s top three tips to family members and friends who learn that their loved one has been diagnosed with cancer.

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“Family and friends frequently do not know what to say and that is perfectly understandable” said Bright. “As a general rule of thumb, it may be better not to say anything. Admitting you do not know what to say and offering silent support can actually convey a strong message of caring.”

1. The number one thing you shouldn’t do is give advice: “You need to go to this doctor, think positively, exercise, eat this food, start juicing or take this supplement.”

These types of statements can undermine the doctor’s plan of care for the patient. They also could cause the woman to think if she does not heed the advice, she may be viewed as not doing everything possible to fight the cancer.

Bright suggests a more helpful way to communicate may be to say: “ Tell me about your treatment. What is it like for you? How do you feel about it?”

“Sometimes the most encouraging thing a woman can hear is, ‘I‘m here to support you in whatever you do to fight this,’” she added.

2. Someone once asked Bright, “Is that your hair?” With a straight face, she replied, “Why yes I bought it.”

Rather than asking questions about hair loss or other changes in physical appearance, Bright recommends giving compliments such as, “That’s a great color on you. What a cute dress.” She understands that women don’t always want to be reminded of their cancer.

3. Bright acknowledges that it can be uncomfortable to talk with someone who is dealing with cancer and the many unknowns that go along with it. People don’t know what to say and want to say optimistic, hopeful words of comfort.

However, comments such as “I have a good feeling about this.” Or “You are going to be just fine.” may actually minimize or negate feelings that are very real for the woman with cancer. Sometimes the greatest comfort is a simple affirmation of “I am here for you...now and wherever this journey takes you.”

“When all is said and done, it is important to remember that cancer is only one part of a person’s life,” Bright said with a smile. “Fighting it requires a great deal of time and energy. So helping your loved one enjoy the parts of her life that do not involve cancer can be a wonderful, healing gift that does not require any words at all!”

Patients, physicians, families and friends will gather for the 2014 Hike for the Cure on Saturday, November 8, in Laguna Beach, CA. The hike donates all proceeds to the Nancy Yeary Women’s Cancer Research Foundation. For updates on the hike please visit Hike for the Cure. Hikers may pledge donations and receive additional information at NYWCRF.

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About Nancy Yeary Women’s Cancer Research Foundation
The Nancy Yeary Women’s Cancer Research Foundation is a pioneering clinical research group dedicated to improving cure rates for women with ovarian, endometrial, uterine, cervical and other gynecological cancers. Currently, the Foundation is studying a first-in-the-world ovarian cancer stem cell vaccine and leading a clinical trial of metformin for the treatment of ovarian cancer.

Through a grant by Bob Yeary, given in the memory of his wife, Nancy, and the support of our donors, the Foundation is making strides in finding more effective treatments and new cures for women’s gynecological cancers. For more information about the Nancy Yeary Women’s Cancer Research Foundation, and to join in the fight against women’s cancer, please visit www.NancyCancer.com. Follow us on Face book at Nancy-Yeary-Women’s-Cancer-Research-Foundation and Twitter at WomensCancerRF.

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