THERAPIST THURSDAY: How to Regulate Stress During Covid-19

Stress is high right now for most of the world. Whether that be due to being at home so much, worries about the virus, concerns about the economy, or stress about how we get back to real life. Whether you are leaning towards the stay-at-home way of thinking or hoping for a full and immediate reopening of the economy, or anywhere in between, it is likely that how things are going to play out is weighing on you.

Understanding our nervous system and being able to interpret what the body is telling us is very helpful in knowing what to do to return to a regulated state.

Our nervous system can be in any one of three different states at various times. When we’re regulated, we feel calm, in control, connected to those we love, and compassionate towards other. When we are dysregulated, it can look like two things: mobilization or immobilization. If we are in a mobilized state, we may have a sudden flood of energy, we are feeling a drive to do something. This flooding can make us feel like we need to get up and get moving. The extra energy in our body can feel uncomfortable, our legs may feel restless or we may feel our muscles tighten up. If we are immobilized, we may be feeling out of energy and hopeless. We may be feeling like giving up or have a sense of despair.

When we are dysregulated, we need to do things to return to a regulated state. Here’s how:

If we are feeling mobilized, we need to do something to burn off this energy. Find things to do that are safe and discharge the energy. You may decide to clean out a closet or mop the floor. A workout may be helpful. Perhaps going on a walk and getting some fresh air will help you feel reset. The key is to do something that burns the energy that is organized, as opposed to being frantic or disorganized.

If we feeling immobilized, we need to do something to bring back our energy that is calm and gentle. You can do things like journal, meditate, do yoga, or talk to a friend. You can find things to be grateful for and create a gratitude list. You could read or work on a jigsaw puzzle.

If you are already feeling regulated, calm and OK, it is good to do activities that keep you in this state. Ask yourself what helps you keep feeling connected to other or feels like it will nurture your creativity. Work on things that make you feel happy. Maybe that is gardening or reading or talking with a friend. Maybe you enjoy drawing, coloring, or doing other artwork.

The main thing to keep in mind is that it is very likely that you may jump between these various states at different times during this experience. Learn to notice your body and understand what it is telling you. Do not judge yourself for how you are feeling. Understand that it is all to be expected during this unprecedented and unpredictable time. Show yourself grace and give yourself what you need, even if that various day-to-day or even minute-to-minute. Know that you are not alone on this roller coaster of emotions. I, personally, have been in all of these states myself at various times. I’ve had nights where sleep was difficult, times I felt I could burst out of my skin with energy, and times when I’ve been deep in worry or feelings of helplessness. And then I’ve had times when I’ve felt grateful for this extra time with family and had a sense that everything would be OK. At times, like many of us, I’ve felt all of these emotions in the same day.

The truth is, we’re all on a roller coaster of emotions right now. As a result, the state of our nervous system will vary. If we all give ourselves grace to feel how we feel and we understand what our body is telling us and listen to what we need, we will all get through this!

Rochelle Whitson is a licensed psychotherapist in private practice in Temecula, CA. She can be reached by email at meetme4therapy@gmail.com.