THERAPIST THURSDAY: Is Your Teen Depressed?

Today’s teens are under much more pressure than ever before! The push to get good grades and excel in sports is high. Worries about issues such as getting into college, stress that may exist within the family, body image, and the pressure of peer relationships all increase the overwhelming feelings a teen may experience. These issues are exacerbated by the internet and social media use. Bullying is easier and often goes unnoticed due to social media. The combination of any of these stressors may lead to depression in a teen. So how do you know if your teen is depressed?

Here are some signs:

· Loss of interest in pleasurable activities. If your teen used to have a hobby or interest and now doesn’t seem to do that thing anymore, he or she may be depressed.

· Difficulty with cognition. If your teen is having memory problems, difficulty concentrating or focusing, seems to have difficulty thinking or doing homework, this may be a sign of depression, especially if this is a change for your child.

· Negative thoughts. If your teen seems to think of everything in a negative way, he may be depressed. I describe this to people as the individual seeming like they have tinted glasses on. They’re seeing things, but there is a negative tint to all of it.

· Loss of interest in socializing. If your teen is suddenly isolating, if she doesn’t seem interested in going places with friends or talking with them via texting or social media, she may be depressed.

· Exaggerated sense of failure or worthlessness. If your teen seems to think he is always failing (even when he clearly isn’t), this may be a sign of depression. If your teen seems to believe he is worthless, depression may be to blame.

· Low self-esteem. If your teen can’t seem to identify any positive traits about himself, depression may be present.

· Feeling empty, hopeless, or “numb”. If your kid expresses any of these feelings, I highly recommend exploring things further to determine if he is depressed.

· Low energy or tiredness. If your kid seems constantly tired, not just sleeping more than normally like many growing teens do, but genuinely seems to constantly lack energy or be tired or drained, depression should be assessed for.

· Poor personal hygiene. If your kid used to care about her appearance and suddenly starts smelling, not showering often, and not grooming, depression may be the cause.

· Frequent somatic complaints. If your teen often complains about physical ailments such as stomach aches, headaches, etc., it may be that they are actually experiencing depression. It is often easier to talk about physical pain than emotional pain. So it is quite common for people, especially teens, to discuss physical pain when really, they are in emotional pain.

· ANGER. If your teen is having frequent angry outbursts, he may be depressed! This is one that can be tricky, because we often think of depression as withdrawal and sadness, but it is actually quite common that depression in teens manifests itself through anger, OFTEN MANIFESTING MORE THAN ANY OTHER SYMPTOM!

· Self harm. If you notice unexplained cuts, burns, or bruises on your teen, check it out! If their explanation doesn’t seem feasible or likely, investigate further! Often teens who are depressed act out through self harming behaviors. Cutting is a behavior that is so much more common today than even five or ten years ago. If your kid has cut, EVEN ONCE, seek professional help immediately. It is an issue you do not want to continue, as it can grow very, very quickly. I urge you not to take their word for it that it was “a one-time thing” or that they have stopped. It is a sign that they are struggling and need help.

· Suicidal thoughts or behaviors. If your teen expresses any suicidal thoughts or behaviors, they need IMMEDIATE PROFESSIONAL INTERVENTION.

One of the challenging things about depression in teens is that it can be difficult to differentiate depression from “normal” teen behavior. For example, what teen doesn’t sleep more than they used to or isn’t moody or angry at times? And certainly, all teens seem to want to live in their rooms without much contact with their family. If you notice CHANGES in their regular patterns, quite a few of the symptoms listed above, or a general sense of sadness or apathy, these are indications that it may be time to start investigating more. And if your kid starts not to care about things that have always mattered or starts to skirt responsibilities they have always been on top of, it’s time to act. If your kid refuses to attend school, something must be done.

Because depression is a cycle, it can escalate very quickly. The sooner there is intervention, the more likely things can be turned around. So, I urge you to act quickly! And if your kid falls into any of the following categories, he or she is at much greater risk of suffering from depression, so be on the lookout: having been the victim of abuse or neglect of some kind in the course of their lives; having another mental health condition or diagnosis, such as ADHD or Autism Spectrum Disorder; experiencing ongoing pain or suffering from a medical condition; having poor body image or issues that negatively impact self esteem such as peer problems, bullying, obesity, or academic problems; having learning difficulties/ struggles or a learning disability; experiencing sexual identity issues or being gay, lesbian, bisexual, or transgender and being in an unsupportive environment (at home or within the community); abusing alcohol or other substances. Family issues can also increase the risk of a teen becoming depressed. Things like: having a family member who has committed suicide; a family history of depression or mental illness; consistent family conflict within the home; changes or stressors within the family such as divorce or death; or substance abuse within the family.

Depression is a serious issue amongst the teen population. And it is important that it not be ignored once it is identified. It is also a very treatable issue and often one that can be completely resolved, or managed quite successfully. But this can only be done if it is faced and dealt with. And of course, if one is ever concerned about possible suicide or is having self harming thoughts of any kind, it is imperative that they reach out. If the threat is immediate, calling 911 is the best course of action. Crisis lines can also be very helpful for supporting a person with suicidal thoughts. The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline can be reached within the US at 800-273-TALK or 800-273-8255. They also have a webchat available at suicidepreventionlifeline.org/chat.

No one should suffer from depression in silence. If you think your teen may be depressed, open the lines of communication, find out what is happening with them, and most importantly, get them HELP! The teen years are hard, but with the right help and support, they can be navigated successfully!

Rochelle Whitson is a psychotherapist in private practice in Temecula, CA. She can be reached by email at meetme4therapy@gmail.com.