Mothers Were Different Back When

I was once jogging near the Venice lifeguard headquarters, when I thought I recognized another jogger. I couldn't place him, but I was sure I knew him – and liked him. At the breakwater, I turned around and caught him on his way back. I gave him a big wave, and he responded with a hello and a smile.

As we passed each other I realized who he was: Tony Dow, who played Wally on the classic TV sitcom "Leave it to Beaver."

This exchange happened almost 30 years ago, when I first moved to Venice, but I am reminded of it now, because on Saturday, Dow's TV mom, Barbara Billingsley, died at the age of 94 in Santa Monica.

Billingsly played June Cleaver for all six seasons (and later films) of "Leave It To Beaver." June Cleaver was a stay-at-home mom with two kids, Wally and "Beaver," in the comfortable suburb of Mayfield, USA.

When the series debuted in 1957, it resembled my life as the older of two brothers. My dad donned a suit to go to his office every day, just like Wally's dad, while my mother watched us and did housework.

I didn't notice that my own mother did not clean as June Cleaver did in pearls and high heels, or that my Catholic working-class Boston neighborhood wasn't as idyllic as Mayfield.  "Leave it to Beaver" was told from the kids' point of view. If we just did the right thing, everything would turn out all right. Mom always loved us. Dad was a font of wisdom.

Back then, TV served as a common consciousness. With only three networks, we shared a television culture, albeit white, Protestant and suburban. And, overwhelmingly, it was a culture of defined roles and a generally happy, safe, and secure image.

Today, with a fragmented media universe, we can't even seem to define what we aspire to be as a people. Is it any wonder that we're at cultural loggerheads?

Here's a toast to your memory, Barbara Billingsley, as the icon of a simpler time – although I have to admit that your turn as the jive talking translator on the 1980 film "Airplane" was more fun.