Relationships: 11 Locals Say When They Are In and When They Are Over

You have been dating someone for some time, spending a lot of time with them. You are truly enjoying each other’s company and perhaps engaging in acts of love making that you would only do if you were in a relationship, yet you really still don’t know where you stand, because you haven’t had “the talk.” 

It's the one no one wants to be the first to bring up. Sure, just asking, “Where do we stand,” is what should be done, but that will make you seem desperate or clingy. Still, you need to know.

You are probably driving yourself crazy and those around you, wanting to know whether you should change your Facebook status to “in a relationship,” and telling yourself, “If only we had the talk,” while rocking yourself back and forth in the dark in a bathrobe, eating a tub of Rocky Road ice-cream.

Needless to say, I know that I’m not the only one to have found myself in this predicament, choosing to live in a nonchalant world of oblivion, thinking and hoping for a fairytale ending sans bathrobe.

So with this, I took my questions to the streets and asked people who are generally for the most part just as messed up as me when it comes to relationships. The following is from two separate nights out in West Hollywood—first at 's Wednesday night comedy show, "The S.H.P Show," then the following week at 's Tuesday night “Lock and Loaded Comedy” show.

When do you know you are in a relationship and how do you know it is over?

Danny Farrell, 30, straight/single:

• In: When she has a toothbrush at my place.
• Over: No contact or desire for a week.

Sandro Iocolano, 32, straight/single:

• In: When you want that person around, and not just for sex.
• Over: When it’s too late.

Mara Marek, 30, straight/single:

• In: Eyes aren’t wandering.
• Over: Everything they do starts bothering me.

Seamus Reed, 26, straight/single:

• In: When I’m becoming habitually judged.
• Over: When I feel a sense of relief.

Dina Martinez, late 30s, transgender/single:

• In: When he doesn’t leave after sex.
• Over: When he doesn’t leave after sex.

Meg Swertlow, 28, straight:

• In: When you have the talk.
• Over: Have the bigger talk.

Nina Daniels, late 20s:

• In: They call back.
• Over: You call too much and they don’t call back, and then you hope they are not dead.

Luke Handbury, 38, straight/single:

• In: When you hang out all the time.
• Out: When you realize they just want to be friends.

Shari Gulley, 25-35, bi-curious/single:

• In: You get comfortable and stop shaving below.
• Over: All my glasses are broken, because I’ve thrown them at him/her.

Angela Tom, 30s, straight/single:

• In: Calls everyday and I have a yeast infection.
• Over: When I need batteries.

Nik Wilcox, 37, gay/it’s complicated:

• In: After three sex dates and you want a fourth.
• Over: Stop having sex.

So with all that, the award for the best, most direct, pull no punches and leave nothing to wonder answer goes to single and straight 27-year-old Dustin David. When asked how he knows he’s in a relationship, he says “I ask,” yet when it came to "When do you know it’s over," he answered, “When I can’t stop crying in my Haggen Dazs.”