The Legend of Christmas Mary

I was at the recently to mail some Christmas packages. When I got in the door I saw much to my dismay, a line of about ten people all with the same plan. Get the job done and move along as soon as possible. I started to think about other things I could be doing and my mind was wandering. When I came back to reality, I notice that a little old lady was now at the front of the line. I didn't remember seeing her in line a few minutes ago and I wasn't sure how she had gotten there.

The line suddenly came to a halt and everyone stopped talking. Then I heard the women's voice like it was being amplified, "I'll have three baby Jesus stamps," she said. "But not those cutesy ones they make him look unholy. Then I'll have four of the Mary stamps the ones where she has the nice smile."

The patrons were starting to get restless and began murmuring among themselves.

The lady wasn't done yet; "Give me Frosty the Snowman," she said, and on and on for another twenty minutes.

Finally she told the clerk she was done and asked how much she owed. With a great sigh of relief the clerk said, "Twenty dollars and ten cents." The old lady began searching her pockets for money, pulling out tissues, lint and cough drops – everything but money. Suddenly she turned around and asked very loudly, "Anybody back there getting inpatient?" I started to raise my hand, but the man in front of me pushed my arm down and shook his head no.

After ten minutes more of mothballs and gum, the old woman was done and turned to leave the building. As she walked past me she stopped. Her eyes locked onto mine and a chill ran down my spine."It's a good thing you shut up young man ,a very good thing," she said to me. After she was gone the man in front of me asked if I knew who the women was. I said, "No, why?" "That was the ghost of Christmas Mary," he explained.

Legend has it that she was once in love with a mail man, who failed to deliver. He was lost in a snow storm on Christmas eve bringing toys to an orphanage. "I continued to listen in amazement as the man continued with his story. "Mary was found by her family Christmas morning. She was under the tree where she had died of a broken heart. And every year since her ghost comes to the post office to search for her lost lover and make the long lines longer."

I asked him, "So why did you put my arm down and tell me not to talk?"

"Well you see, that's the curse part. If you had said anything you would have been cursed for life," he told me. 

"Come on!" I said, "What kind of curse?"

"The spell sentences you to be stuck in long lines where ever you go for the rest of your life. Everywhere: stores, buffets anywhere you are in a hurry. Your life would bog down into one big slow, mind numbing line."

That afternoon I wrote this cautionary tale so that everyone would know about the legend. So, remember the next time you're in a long slow line at the post office you might just be behind, Christmas Mary.