Happy Father's Day Ahead For This Dad, Whose Life His Son Helped Save

GROTON CITY, CT —It was nearly 1:30 on that early May morning when Nathan heard the screams of his mother. He was up late, watching videos, when he heard her cries. The next four to five minutes were the longest of the 14-year-old's life, he said.

Flashing back a couple of years, Nathan's mother Jennifer had shared with him a course being offered by the City of Groton's Parks & Rec Department that he might be interested in. A babysitting class, Child and Babysitting Safety. He signed up. Perhaps not so much for the babysitting part, though he'd likely learn some very useful skills. It was the other portion of the class that was appealing and, it would turn out, critically important in his and his family's life.

Back to May 1.

Jennifer and her husband were in bed asleep, as the hour was late. But she was awakened by what she thought was her husband's loud snoring.

"It was a funny noise," she recalled in a recent Patch interview with the Detmer family. "'Matt,' I said, 'You're snoring!'" as she tried to wake her husband. "I turned on the light ...he stopped breathing! 'Matt, wake up,' I screamed. The noise he was making sounded like choking. I screamed. Nathan came in."

What happened next, the next very few minutes, was akin to time standing still.

"Nathan ran in and said, 'Call 911!' (Her husband) had stopped making the noises. He wasn't breathing. I started compressions. I breathed in his mouth, then, Nathan took over."

Jennifer said that she doesn't remember how long ago she took a CPR class. And wasn't even certain she was doing it correctly. But Nathan knew. He continued to perform chest compressions as he learned in the babysitting class that included a CPR component.

"He was doing the chest compressions and then somebody, it seemed like the longest time ever to wait, it was two cops, they came in and took over," Jennifer recalled.

Nathan said that for him, too, time was at once suspended but long.

"Those three or four minutes were the longest of my life," he said. Two police officers who were performing life-saving measures were soon joined by firefighters and medics.

"They brought him out of the house. I remember one of the police officers giving me a fist bump," Nathan remembered. The rest is a sort of blur.

"I saw that officer (recently) and he drove by and waved to me." It's likely the officer would remember the boy, as he was in part responsible for saving his father's life.

Jennifer said that through the ordeal, she was in a complete panic. But her young son remained inexplicably composed, even if on the inside, he was terrified.

"He was the calm one through all it," she said.

'They saved my life'

Father of two, Nathan and 10-year-old Emma, Matt Detmer is just 40 years old.

What he remembers about Sunday night, April 30, is watching basketball on TV before going to bed around 10:30 p.m. His next memory was waking up the following day in the Intensive Care Unit at L+M Hospital in New London. He'd suffered a cardiac arrest.

After being rushed to Yale New Haven Hospital, though it would take many tests over the course of a couple of days, doctors discovered that he had "damage on both sides of my heart," he explained.

On May 4, Matt underwent heart surgery and a defibrillator was implanted. It was then that he fully comprehended what had happened.

"I was shocked. I'm alive. (His wife and son) did a wonderful job to save me," he said, weeks after the incident. The otherwise "very healthy" dad admitted that cardiac arrests, like what he suffered, "Don't really happen to 40-year-olds."

He is on the mend and expects to return to his job at UPS in August.

Doctors at Yale thanked Nathan

While Detmer was at Yale, "all the doctors said thank you to Nathan," Jennifer said.

"Everyone, the doctors, came to talk to us and spoke to Nathan about what he'd done," she recalled. And it was then that Nathan knew that what he'd done was a very big deal.

A freshman at the Marine Science Magnet High School of Southeastern Connecticut in Groton, he enjoys fishing, art, and the study of history, his "favorite." The latter was the field he thought he might go into after college. Not anymore. He wants to be a doctor.

Saving lives is his goal. He's done it once. He can do it again.

"A doctor said I should go into the medical field. Now, I feel this is more of a reason to go. I'm so calm in situations like that. Something in my brain kicks in, and I get full control," he said confidently. And, Nathan is passionate about advocating for CPR to be taught in schools. For all kids.

"He wants other kids to know how to do CPR," Jennifer said. "He told me he wants to go to medical school now. I'm so proud of him."

That all said, it was a traumatic event. But Nathan has been working through it. He's spoken to a school counselor about the incident and how he's coping. But he worries about his father. His mom does, too: "I still wake up in the middle of the night checking his breathing," she said.

Honoring Nathan

Later this month, Groton City and the state Legislature will honor Nathan for his heroism.

“The Detmer family will soon enjoy a very special Father’s Day thanks to the CPR training Nathan learned through the Groton Parks and Rec Department,” state Sen. Heather Somers (R-Groton) said. “For that, we can all give thanks and help raise awareness of why CPR training helps 14-year olds like Nathan and people of all ages save lives every day."

On June 20 at Groton City Mayor Keith Hedrick's office, with Somers and other officials, Nathan will receive an award from both the city and the state Legislature.

"It is our hope that Nathan’s story will inspire others to get CPR training and encourage people throughout Connecticut to become CPR instructors. Being trained in CPR provides the knowledge, confidence, and skills to stay calm in a medical emergency and help a person in need," Somers said. "Nathan and his dad are living proof of that good news.”

Editor's note: The Detmer family wanted to share its thanks and gratitude to Groton City Police officers Nick Cardelle and JP Precourt, who were first to arrive on the scene, and Groton City Fire Department first responders, the people who took over from Nathan, life-saving efforts.