My 3 Moms

Mothers Day is one of those annual events about which I am pretty cynical. I refer to it as a “Hallmark Holiday,” contrived to drum up business for card and flower companies. I'm wrong, of course. Mothers Day has been around for millenia in various forms (this website has a pretty good history), celebrated first in the context of religion and later as a protest against the carnage of war. So it is not a new contrivance, it's just morphed into a Hallmark event in today's society.

 And yet each year I find myself reflecting on motherhood as Mothers Day approaches, particularly on mother/daughter relationships.

 Two of my moms are the mothers of men I married. These two women couldn't be more different from one another in personality and background yet each raised amazing sons to be responsible citizens and family oriented – not an easy task. We are forever bound together through their sons. Now that I'm a “sandwich generation” mom I have better insight into just how difficult it must have been for them to share their only sons with me, and I am grateful for their patience as I (hopefully!) matured over time. To Marge and Nancy, thank you for sharing your sons, thank you for welcoming me into your families, and thank you for your continued love and support.

 I am in awe of the only woman I call “Mom.” I am her first child, born when she was but a child herself at 18 years old. Like so many other families just starting out, she created a magical family life despite financial hardship and personal agony. She taught my sisters and me about manners, morals, the ins and outs of daily responsibilities, striving to reach high academic expectations. She taught us how to laugh. She loved me through all my awful, selfish stages in childhood and young adulthood. She didn't hold a grudge. She celebrated with me when I finally earned my college degree, consoled me when my first husband died, and she allowed me to play duplicate bridge with her even though that meant she would be the big loser that day. To Mom, thanks for everything. Who I am today is intimately connected to your unconditional love.

Three moms, three very different relationships, all built around the concept of motherhood. Each has enriched my life in ways I could never imagine.

So maybe I need to be a little less cynical and embrace the idea that we set aside a little time each year to honor our mothers. Happy Mothers Day!