Meatless Monday: Money for Nothing

It’s Monday, so you know that means; another look at the news that amused this week!

As well as writing, I love to read so this headline caught my eye this week “The Oddest Book Title in the World Award.” Among the contenders are; How to  Sharpen Pencils by David Rees, Goblinproofing One’s Chicken Coop by Reginald Bakeley and How Tea Cosies Changed the World by Loani Prior. I was intrigued; sometimes authors chose unusual/misleading titles to grab attention so I did some investigating. It turns out Rees book IS actually about sharpening pencils. In a description about the book, author Rees is depicted as “The world’s number one #2 pencil sharpener, he still practices the age-old art of manual pencil sharpening.” There is humor in the book too, he gives tips on how to sneak into someone’s house and smash mechanical pencil sharpeners with a mallet. I hope that’s tongue in cheek….anyway my book club can rest easy; I won’t be choosing any of the contenders for my selection.

We just booked flights for our family vacation, but after I read this story I’m thinking maybe we should drive. According to New Zealand Medical Journal flying causes flatulence, and holding it in may lead to painful medical consequences. I was not really interested in the cause, but the authors decided to tackle the best way to handle the bloat. According to the Emily Post Institute, passengers should go to the bathroom to pass gas, and if that’s not possible be discreet. Asking your seatmate to pull your finger is not recommended. The authors of the study also suggested that airlines install charcoal seats to absorb the odor….or passengers can wear charcoal lined underwear. How about you just lay off the beans and soda before you board?

On the subject of pointless research, The University of Maryland came out with results to a study that had me speechless; Sit down, this may shock you, but they found that women talk more than men. Really? I had no idea; I bet it came as a surprise to my husband too. I wonder how much money was spent on that study. Millions of dollars are wasted, I mean spent each year on pointless research; Dutch psychologists discovered that leaning to the left made the Eiffel Tower appear smaller and researchers from Georgia found that chimpanzees can recognize each other from photos of their rear ends. The next time I put my hair up I can relax in the knowledge that physicists spent time and money calculating the balance of forces that shape and move the hair in a human ponytail. I'm so glad they did that, I was losing sleep thinking about my hair.

Does anyone know where I can get a job studying the obvious or absurd? I took a quick look in the classified but didn’t find anything. Oh well, I guess I will be seeing another pointless blog from me next week!