Local NAACP Cancels Donald Sterling’s Lifetime Achievement Award: The Los Angeles chapter of the NAACP announced that it has decided not give embattled Clippers owner Donald Sterling a Lifetime Achievement Award after racist statements attributed to him became public. If they need someone to fill in in a pinch, I hear Nevada rancher Cliven Bundy might be available.
Laptop Heat Danger to Legs: Doctors are warning consumers not to leave a warm laptops on their lap for too long because the skin on your legs can be burned by long-term heat exposure. You know there's a good chance your laptop may have heat issues when it includes a dial with settings for “warm, simmer and defrost.”
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Tomato Executive Pleads Guilty to Price Fixing: Frederick Scott Salyer, a member of one of California’s best known farming families and the founder of SK Foods, has pleaded guilty to a scheme to inflate tomato product prices. After passing sentence, the judge asked Salyer “so how do you like them apples?”
Bill Gates Calls the Mosquito Deadliest Creature on Earth: According to the Bill Gates Foundation, the deadliest creature on earth is not humans, but the mosquito which kills 725,000 people a year and incapacitates another 200 million people. And that may be just “scratching” the surface.
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California Hiker Killed by Oregon Hunter: A California man who was hiking in Oregon has been killed by a hunter who mistook him for a bear. Local officials say this senseless tragedy may have been prevented had the hiker not been wearing a “Cal Bears” sweatshirt.
Commissioner Silver Bans Sterling for Life from NBA: Commissioner Adam Silver announced that he has banned Los Angeles Clippers owner Donald Sterling for life from the NBA. Analysts are calling the decision pure “Sterling-Silver.”