Forever.......

By: Kenneth Stepp

Forever….. That is hard to wrap your mind around. Yet, if love enters the picture. Forever is what we are embracing. You see, love is forever. Real love at least. It doesn’t have to be wrapped in romantics, parenting, or friendship. No relationship at all. Love is just love. Free standing and on it’s own. I’ll take a shot at explaining this. Joan Crawford certainly experienced it.

“Love is a fire. But whether it is going to warm your hearth or burn down your house, you can never tell.” ―Joan Crawford

The word love has taken a beating over time. It has been defined, maligned and is way behind. In short. It has become a dating or friendship buzz word. Simply a nice word to describe how one feels. It was never meant to be this at all.. I believe love is an entity. It certainly is not a feeling or urge. Those are better described as infatuation and lust. As someone with a belief in God. I actually believe God is love. And to love is a Godly trait. The only one we can accomplish this side of death. I suppose this will be about my opinion, in part.

To allow love in means that we have opened our hearts to many things. Love brings exciting, wonderful things when we invite it in. And, for most of us, pain and hurt as well. In short. Love changes much within us. Having said that. I want more of it in my life. If you’ve had children. Most of you know the love I speak of. Unconditional love. A child can make huge mistakes, hurt us deeper than we ever thought possible. Yet, love endures. Imagine my surprise when I learned that this love was no different from the love I had for another. That the parental component was just that. A component. Love was the center, the core, not parenting. Unconditional love. Love stands alone. Parenting, romance, and friendship. These are words we label love with to understand it better. For me. Understanding it fully has been a journey itself. Some put friendship in every category.

“It is not a lack of love, but a lack of friendship that makes unhappy marriages.” ―Friedrich Nietzsche

There is wisdom in including friendship in parenting, romance, and even business. But, friendship isn’t love. We can however, love a friend. Until I did, I thought this was impossible. I suppose experience is the best teacher after all.

With love, we want a relationship. Why? Because when we really love a person. We want them in our orbit. We want to have a relationship with them. Relationships are tricky. If done right, they can be amazing. A relationship is simply having a person in your life. If love exists. They will have access to your heart when needed. They can “use you”, and that’s ok. Love sees no flaws, they will remain perfect and remain a part of who you are. Nothing is required where real love dwells. Just being.

“A relationship never dies a natural death. It dies because we don’t know how to replenish its source. It dies of blindness and errors and betrayals. It dies of illness and wounds; it dies of weariness, of witherings, of tarnishings.”  ―Anaïs Nin

Have I lost you? Hey, I lose me while trying to fully understand love. So, don’t feel bad. I’m uncertain we can understand it completely. The one thing I am sure of is, it endures. It is forever. Moving barriers, and lowering walls to make room for it can be difficult. The commitment is huge. The rest of your life. Maybe beyond.

k@kstepp.com

Founder, American Angel Works