Single - "Situation or Lifestyle"

By: Kenneth Stepp

Would you choose this? Single. Not a bad word. Just a word. I believe we define what it means to us individually. I’ve heard all the things said about it. At least I think I have. Proud to be single, it’s miserable, I love single life, it suits me, it’s killing me, etc. You get it. Everyone has their own thing to say about it. Some see it as a temporary place they are visiting. Others see it as a choice they have made. Either way. Anyone single has something to say about it.

For me. The truth. It isn’t for me. I can do it. Maybe forever. But it isn’t what I want. It isn’t for me. I am a partner. I am wired for mating. For being someones partner in crime. Exploring is something I do alone now. But having someone I love to explore with sounds amazing to me. Have you ever decided what side of this you fall on? I’m ok, just not fulfilled. You?

Most of the people I meet are in my category. Ok, but better with a partner. I guess many are in different places at different times.I know for myself. I reached a point where I didn’t want to risk my heart again. I thought staying single was best for me. Lifestyle indeed. After a few months, I realized, this wasn’t for me. But to be “back on the market” is scary too. Repulsive in a way. Anyone that has dated a few times know what this feels like. It isn’t fun. It can be quite strange at times. Then there’s allowing yourself to open up again. Maybe I will delay dating for a bit longer. Writing about it may be all I can muster at the moment. Ca sara sara, right?

Dating can be like learning to do circus tricks. If I can dress up like a clown, floppy she as and all, ride a unicycle, while juggling chainsaws that are on, and reciting the pledge of allegiance in Mandarin, while using a British accent. I can date more than one person at a time. It only takes that much talent. Problem solved.

Now. If you lack the manual dexterity for all that. You shall remain single and alone forever. Grow a large mole on your nose, wear a large pointy black hat, and smell bad. There. Kidding. Finding a mate shouldn’t be that hard. It has been for me because I took a path that led to a couple of unexpected things. You may not have. I hope not. For me, time will tell. I know in my heart, I am a mate. I should be mated. Eventually, I will be. Soon maybe.

Today is the day we should all reflect. What do you really want? Not what you have settled for. What you fantasize about. Is it finding someone that worships the ground you walk on? Or just someone fun for a while? Maybe neither one or both? Would you know it if you found them? Some do not. Some, like myself. We’re just not ready yet. We are still healing. Time will take care of it. At least, that’s the plan. Single is not a badge of honor or a scarlet letter. It’s simply a word that explains a status. If you don’t believe me. Check your facebook account.

Serious things deserve serious thought. Single, to some of us is serious. We are all valuable creatures. If you want proof of that. Get a Boxer dog and see how they react when you walk in the door. They don’t care how much you made that day, what you have in the bank, or what mood you are in. They just care that you came home. Their home, they allow you to share with them. My Duchess. My best friend for 14 years, just passed. I was with her. We all were. We all cried. We all made sure the last thing she heard was how much we loved her. During her ceremony, I told my kids. She taught us what unconditional love was. I’ll say it. I want to love my forever that way. My situation is waiting. Nothing more. Is she out there? Do I already know her?

k@kstepp.com

www.stepplife.com

Founder, American Angel Works