Cobb Voters Push for Mickey Mouse, Jesus Christ

Some Cobb voters were so unimpressed with the available candidates on the ballots that they instead cast write-in votes for Batman, Scooby Doo, Santa or Snoopy.

In Tuesday’s primary elections, voters didn’t have the option to write in candidates for party races because Democrats and Republicans were only deciding who to send to the general election in November.

But any person, animal, letter, cartoon character or, ahem, reproductive organ was fair game in the nonpartisan elections. Those included , as well as two—a City Council and a school board seat—just for the city of Marietta. 

In total for Cobb, there are 207 pages worth of Anybody Else, No Vote, Me, Bozo, Big Bird, Awesome Bill from Dawsonville and other write-ins from Tuesday.

If you’re up for perusing the sometimes-comical selections, the sheets are attached. (You'll have to zoom in a couple times.)

Of course, in accordance with Georgia law, none of the write-ins would have been eligible because they didn’t file—or weren’t physically able to do so—the required notice of candidacy before the elections. And even if they had, there have been only a handful of successful write-in efforts ever across the country.

But that didn't stop Cobbers from remembering perhaps the most successful protest vote-getter in U.S. history, Mickey Mouse. His name is seen at least once on most of the write-in pages.

According to MickeyForPresident.com, if Mr. Mouse was elected to America’s top post, he would select another popular Cobb choice, Donald Duck, as his vice president.

Another favored selection, John Doe, was probably written with more honest intentions—there are, after all, three of them listed as residents of Marietta in the phone book.

“My dog Biscuit” and “Max my dog” are likely real, too, but if it came down to a runoff between either of them and another canine candidate, Snoop Dog, name recognition just wouldn’t be there for the former two.

Speaking of music stars, it seems odd that voters would suggest Nickelback and Ted Nugent because of how lightly they’d probably treat the job. And Ray Charles, rest his soul, just simply is not living.

Folks should have known before they went to the polls that President Obama and Ron Paul, though they were very popular write-ins, are far above local politics.

Mayor Quimby of Simpsons fame, on the other hand, is all about local governance. But he hasn’t met the residency requirements since before 1859, the year Springville changed to Powder Springs.

And frequent choice Jesus Christ, well, the Son of God probably appreciates your votes but has more important matters to tend to, like, say, overseeing the entire human race, past and present.

I could go at this for hours, but most of these other write-ins—Paris Hilton, Donald Trump, Stephen Colbert, Kermit the Frog and Judge Judy—are far too easy. I’ll instead pass the torch to you and see what wit you have to offer.

Whose name would you write in for a political office and why? Tell us in the comments!