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The Nankipooh Enquirer: Fish Tales
Well it was so hot and dry back then, that one day I was fishing down at the creek, and when I finally caught a little scrawny catfish......
The Nankipooh Enquirer:
“Covers the south like Sorghum Syrup”
Editor in Chief: Colonel Bascomb Biggers
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Ace Reporter: Scoop Biggers
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RE: “Fish Tales”
I was fishing down at the mill pond with my old cajun buddy Beaudreaux the other day, and the fish weren’t biting much, so we started swapping yarns with one another about fishing trips. Now old Beaudreaux is a famous liar from way back, and he can even out lie most any Skunk or Polecat politician from up in DC, and that’s sayin a lot!
Well I start out, and I say, “Beaudreaux you remember that big drought we had back in ‘95? Well it was so hot and dry back then, that one day I was fishing down at the creek, and when I finally caught a little scrawny catfish, he had three ticks on his back from being out of the water so much.”
“Shoot, that ain’t nothing,” says Beaudreaux. “Last year me and my cousin Jimbo was out on the bayou doing some frog gigging late at night, and just as I had gigged a frog and was fetching him into the boat, a big old channel cat jumped up and grabbed that frog and my gig, and made off with the whole lot. When he did, the kerosene lantern got tangled up in the mess, and he fetched it off with him too. Well we couldn’t see nothing without no light, since there weren’t no moon, so we went on back home.”
“The next day me and old Jimbo went back down to the bayou to look for my frog gig, and we come up on the rope I had tied to it, layin in the water up against the bank. Well at least I got my gig back, I says, and I got ahold of that rope and you know what, when I pulled it out of the water there was my frog gig, with the frog still stuck on it, and holding on to that frog was a twenty pound channel cat. Well looky here! I done got lucky, and I pulled that catfish up out of the water, and you know what? That lantern come up out of the water all tangled up in the rope with the gig! And, do you know what else? It had been so hot and dry that that lantern was still lit!”
Well I knew right then that there was no more use in swapping lies with Beaudreaux! That man could lie his way out of a Lion’s den, with a story about a mouse, and an old shoe, but that’s one for another day.
The fact is, them old Skunks and Polecats up in DC think they got the market cornered when it comes to lying, and I got to admit they sure got a fair amount of the voting folks all caught up in their lies. But when it comes to telling lies, they can’t hold a candle to a good old Southern Boy, especially a Cajun!
Now I have done told you before, that you can trust old Bascomb, because I ain’t never lied to you, except for maybe right now.
“Now, that’s the way I see it, and you can tell’em I said so!”
Bascomb Biggers
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BASCOMB BIGGERS FOR PRESIDENT !
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