"If You Teach An Aspie to Fish . . ."*

By Joel Mengarelli and Carol Baldridge

I love to fish.  When a fish sees my bait, it doesn’t know I have Asperger’s syndrome (but then, I don’t know the fish’s challenges either).  The fish and I simply connect at two ends of a thin, nylon line.  Sitting in a rowboat with my fishing pole in hand, I am just the same as all other men who have waited, watched and outwitted the creatures that swim beneath my baited hook.

Growing up was rough, but my family always stuck by me.  When I was in kindergarten, I had problems with concentration and staying on task.  Experts evaluated me and told my parents I had Attention Deficit Disorder (ADD).  They said I would have challenges all through school.  The diagnosis was changed to autism when I was in high school.  I didn’t like that diagnosis, just like I didn’t like the ADD one.  Autism did explain my behaviors, though, so I finally accepted it.  It made sense.

Usually just Dad and I go fishing.  We have fished in small lakes in the Chicago suburbs and caught bass, bluegill, catfish and sunfish.  When I was 10, I caught my first Chinook salmon in a bay in Door County, WI.  As a teen, I went with my church’s youth group on yearly fishing trips to Michigan’s Upper Peninsula.  We caught northern pike, large bluegill, a perch or two, and largemouth bass.

One year when I couldn’t go with the group, our youth pastor invited just my dad and me to go up there with him.  We three caught a grand total of 97 fish in four days! (I should know - I counted them!) One of them was my first three-foot northern pike.  OK, OK, it was really only 34 inches.  Close enough.  While I was trying to reel it in, my dad joked, “Get a saddle on that thing! It’s a horse!”  I thought that was pretty funny.  Everyone knows you can’t put a saddle on a fish. It would slide off!

Now, normally in groups I relate more to adults, but when I’m with this church group, I become an entirely different person - all because of fishing! 

When the youth group went up to the boundary waters between Minnesota and Canada, it rained and rained, and EVERYTHING was CONSTANTLY soaked.  It was the worst camping trip I’ve ever been on.  I was ready to be my in-the-background Aspie self, but the group decided to have “tarp time.”  We stood under a blue tarp and talked about various “guy” things, such as the Rocky movies.  

On other trips, my dad and I joined the men of my church and chartered a fishing boat in Waukegan, IL.  In Gatlinburg, TN, I baited my hooks with salmon eggs and caught my first rainbow trout.  I hoped the trout didn’t mind that we were using their fish friends’ eggs!

Dad and I went fishing in Central Illinois with a bunch of guys who didn’t know me or know that I’m an Aspie.  I wondered, “What are these guys going to be like?” “Are they going to think I’m weird?” “What will we talk about?” “How are they going to react to some of my behaviors?” It turned out not to matter.  We all just fished.  We caught in less than a day - get this! - 66 bluegill.  Each was as large as MY HAND!  It was a great day of fishing!

What’s so good about my dad and me fishing together? We’re doing something we both love, we get to be outside, we’re talking, and we have some “guy time.”  Plus, fishing is a real learning situation.  In between fishing adventures, my parents go with me to the library to check out books about different kinds of fish and fishing techniques.  We also get maps and travel books about fishing locations for future adventures.

Fishing helps me cope with being an Aspie.  I have a sense of accomplishment while working on my patience.  I don’t have to compete with anybody.  Fishing lets me be myself without being judged.  I don’t feel bad if I don’t catch anything, since there is no competition and there’s always “next time.”  Eye contact is important when another fisherman gives me some sort of instruction.  On a boat, I’ve learned to look at people while they’re talking to me and when I answer.

Fishing can also be very helpful for impulse control and learning to be quiet.  I keep myself from making excessive vocal noises or jerking the pole or dragging the tip of my rod back and forth in the water to make ripples.  If I do any of that, I scare away the fish!  Casting my line and aiming for a certain spot forces me to work on large motor skills.  I use fine motor skills whenever I bait my hook, untangle my line, or change my lure.  Wanting to catch fish helps me fight the urge to constantly reel in my line.  It helps me focus and pay attention.  If I take my eyes off my bobber as it heads into deep water, it could cost me “the BIG one.”

There isn’t any sensory overload while I’m fishing. It’s usually very peaceful and quiet, just sitting on a pier or on a big rock on the shore and seeing slowly moving water in front of me.  There aren’t lots of people to relate to or talk with.  Also, it’s pretty rare for fishermen to talk in loud voices - no one wants to scare the fish.  After all, we’re there to fish, not to have a party.

When it comes down to sharing thoughts and feelings, fishing can help.  I don’t have to look at anyone when I talk.  I’m usually too busy watching my bobber and watching for fish splashing nearby.  Fishing gives me something to talk about with strangers who won’t judge me because they are doing the same things I am.  I listen to other people’s fishing stories and can empathize, because it’s probably happened to me too!  This builds a bridge to improve my social skills. I’ve learned to leave fishermen alone and to stay back, especially when they’re casting.  I sure don’t want to be the one to get hooked!

When it comes down to my need for structure, fishing is a good hobby.  It teaches me a series of simple steps that, if followed correctly, can lead to something very rewarding.  I’m speaking from experience.  My biggest saltwater catch so far is a six-and-a-half footer, and my biggest freshwater fish so far is 34 inches. If we charter a small fishing boat, we may have to rotate turns to catch fish.  This teaches me it’s more fun when we all follow the rules.

Fishing is most fun when I’m actually catching fish!  That’s what makes me want to go on fishing trips.  After all, catching fish is what it's all about!  Like I said in the beginning, the fish don't know (or care) that I'm an Aspie.  And most of the time, the fishermen don’t seem to mind (or notice) either.  Fishing is a way for me to not only hook fish but also to “hook” on to attitudes and behaviors that will make my life more enjoyable.

*This article was co-authored with Carol Baldridge and originally published in the March/April 2011 issue of the "Autism Asperger's Digest."

P.S.:  I've since hooked a 500 pound goliath grouper!