Neighbor News
Marriage and Asperger's: Focus on Strengths
Dr. Clatch writes about the importance of AS and NT partners focusing on the strengths of their relationship during times of disagreement.
Much of the conflict that arises in AS marriages stems from perceptions of one partner regarding what they believe they are missing in the relationship. Neurotypical (NT) partners may become frustrated because they believe that they are not getting the support that they need from their partners. While these feelings are valid, the frustrated partner may be better suited to focus on the strengths of their partner and what their partner brings to the relationship that makes them happy.
As with all relationships, marriages between NT and AS partners must always include mutual communication and building of trust and understanding. Also present in all relationships are disagreements and disputes, which may leave one or both partners feeling misunderstood and unsupported. It is important, in moments like these, for partners to give each other some space to collect themselves and remind themselves why they love their partner; once they have achieved calmer states, they can then reconvene to discuss what happened and what can be done to mend hurt feelings. When these issues become the focus of attention, strengths can be used as the basis for fortifying the relationship.
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