Mom Talk: Dim Bulbs Extinguish Behind the Wheel

by Erin Gallagher

Mamma had it right when she always said “stupid is as stupid does.”

Recently, I ran into a classic example. Or rather, she nearly ran into us – almost literally.

After shopping with my kiddos, we securely held hands as we walked through the parking lot to our car. A busy morning there was a lot of traffic when a Honda began backing out of a parking spot.

Cautiously, the driver looked around and saw us, paused, then proceeded slowly after we made eye contact; she was good to go.

Just then, a broad in a gigantic Lexus quickly backed of a spot directly opposite the Honda. She didn’t pause. She didn’t look. From where I stood, I could see she was staring at the apple she was eating and did not bother to check her mirrors.

I yelled to the driver in the Honda to stop because the cars were about to collide. The Honda quickly pulled forward, avoiding the crash.

Meanwhile, another mom and child were walking in the path of the Lexus and dashed between other cars to safety. The broad in the Lexus didn’t blink as she took another bite at her apple.

Myself, not ever possessing demure-like traits, I flagged the Lexus to stop.

“Did you see what just happened?,” I asked the dim wit, as I noticed she also needed her roots done.

“What?,” she countered, like Vinnie Babarino, still crunching on her apple.

“You nearly hit that Honda there, and that mother and child over there,” I said, as nonchalantly as my Chicago moxy could muster.

“I got sensors that beep before I hit something,” she said.

I knew the feeling, as I heard my own bells go off in my head. Rather than correcting her grammar, I quietly paused.

“Perhaps you should have them checked, because you just terrorized a bunch of people,” I said, silently proud of myself for not swearing.

The Honda driver and the other mother were both a little shaken. Each of them also had children with them, which amps up the natural anxiety ordained to us in childbirth.

The Honda waited until the Lexus left before she attempted backing out again. We exchanged a couple “can you believe that just happened” comments.

I like technology as much as the next mom. My car is loaded with gizmos, some I don’t even understand. Still, none of that matters.

Technology should not replace common sense. Fancy automobiles do not mean that drivers get a pass on using basic safety practices. This woman believed that because her car would ding before she hit something that it meant she didn’t need to look.

In this case, she was going fast. Had the other two women not acted quickly, the ding would have dung too late.

God gave the woman a brain, along with rear view mirrors. Would have been nice had she used any of them.