Center of the Universe Shorewood Rewind

We here at the Shorewood Patch were thumbing through the New York Post the other day and we saw something about a Miss Universe contest somebody's putting together down in Brazil in about a week or so.

The first thing we thought when we saw this was, "Whoa — wait a minute. There must be some mistake. The universe surely knows we already had a beauty pageant. It was right here in Shorewood, and it was called the Miss Shorewood Crossroads contest. Why would the universe ever need to have another beauty pageant? At least until the next Miss Shorewood Crossroads contest. And why would they have it in Brazil of all places?"

That was the first thing we thought. Then we thought about it some more, and it still wasn't making any sense.

Now, we know some city in Brazil beat out Chicago for the Olympics. But that really wasn't a surprise. What's so great about Chicago anyway? If the Olympics aren't going to be held in Shorewood, who cares where they have them?

If Shorewood had thrown its hat in the ring for the Olympics, you can be certain Shorewood would have gotten back its hat, taken the ring it threw it in, and laid claim to the Olympic Games. Take that to the bank. Just don't take it to the Bank of Shorewood, because they had, shall we say, some trouble recently and are sort of unavailable at the moment.

Not that Shorewood wanted the Olympics or anything like that. Shorewood has enough trouble with all those Joliet people driving around without licenses or insurance, or rear registration lights. With the Olympics, you can forget about it. There would undoubtedly be an influx of foreigners doing things like rowing boats on the DuPage River or playing water polo in the town pool, if there was a town pool. But you know what we mean.

So you can keep your Olympics, Brazil. And keep your Miss Universe contest, universe. We have everything we could ever hope to have right here, thank you very much, including a great week that just ended. Why don't we take a look at that week right now? We do it every Sunday, and we call it the SHOREWOOD REWIND.

Shorewood likes "Limitless"

The movie Limitless was the first choice for movie rentals in Shorewoodland, according to Redbox.

This time it's bound to work

The lawyers representing Drew Peterson petitioned the Illinois Supreme Court to spring the alleged wife-killer from jail while he waits on the start of his murder trial. They made four similar attempts at getting Peterson out in the last two and a half years. All of them failed.

Prosecutors want to send slain wife's emails to jury

Prosecutors set a date to argue the merits of allowing a jury to read emails written by the slain wife of alleged murderer Christopher Vaughn. Vaughn, 36, is charged with killing his 34-year-old wife Kimberly and their three children — Blake, 8, Cassandra, 11, and Abigayle, 12. Prosecutors contend that the emails will show Kimberly Vaughn was not in a suicidal state of mind, as Christopher Vaughn has reportedly claimed.

Minor league team goes where Chicago's big league clubs can't

The Slammers — the closest professional sports team to Shorewood, clinched a spot in the playoffs, which is almost unheard of for the professional baseball teams of Chicago.