'Ask Debbie Sue' Dating advice with Author & Comedian Debbie Sue Goodman

Here’s a letter from one of my readers regarding this topic.

Dear Debbie Sue: “I read your columns about taking photos and cell phone etiquette on a date, and agree with you completely. I’ve been dating a guy for a couple of months that is nice to me in most ways, but he recently bought a new phone with a camera that he uses everywhere he goes! The other night we were out to dinner, and he took photos of all the women in the restaurant. While we ate, he offered some of his food to the table next to us, where 3 single women were having dinner. He asked if they were single and if he could take their picture! It made me feel like he’d rather be with them instead of me. He takes photos outside while walking to the car and eyes all the women when we’re at concerts and takes their photos! Sometimes he doesn’t ask them and he just snaps away. Lately, I only enjoy our time together when we’re alone in his apartment on weekends. He pays more attention to me there. Last week he took his cell phone into the shower! When I asked why he did that, he said he needed to check his e-mails while he was getting ready. I’m thinking of ending our relationship but he’s an ok guy most of the time. I don’t appreciate him staring at other women while he’s out with me and taking their photos. Not sure what to do.” Cathy

Dear Cathy, This guy is very rude. Snapping photos of other women while he's with you, is very inconsiderate. If he takes their pictures while you’re on a dinner date or anywhere you go, it's simply un-called for. He sounds like he needs ‘attention’ and he’s immature. If the only time you have his attention is when you’re alone, then I would certainly speak to him about his behavior. If he recently just started this rudeness, because he bought a new phone, then tell him your feelings. Tell him you miss the way he treated you before he bought his new phone. I would certainly tell him he’s hurting your feelings by ‘eyeing’ other women and taking their photos while he’s on a date with you. If he continues and doesn’t respect your feelings, I would move on and find someone else. There’s plenty of men out there that will enjoy your company and give you their ‘full attention’ without a cell phone in sight. Good luck to you!

To my reader that wishes to be 'Anonymous.' Who wrote & said she's, 'At her wits End!' Seeking an answer about her girlfriend of almost 40 years, that is always late when they set up a dinner date. Tell her your time is just as valuable as hers. If she's constantly a half-hour late & doesn't apologize, tell her that her behavior is upsetting you. Regarding her texting constantly while you're sitting with her. Tell her to please put her phone away in her purse or 'set it aside' while you're eating. Tell her you would like to continue to share lunch or dinner or other activities together but you don't want to hear her talking on the phone the whole time. The proper way she should answer the phone calls unless, it's an emergency, is to excuse yourself, & take the call in another room of the restaurant. If she's texting the whole time you're eating & not paying attention to you, that's just plain rude. You said she gets, ' Snide & defensive?' It sounds like this woman needs to constantly have 'her way' or she's not happy. You said you're not sure why you put up with this? You need to love & respect yourself so other's will respect you too. You've been friends for a long time & it sounds like she's been behaving like this the entire time. How about the next time you make plans with her, you show up a half-hour late? Don't pay attention to anything she says. Talk & text on your phone. I do believe this will solve the problem. Hopefully, she'll get the hint & treat you with respect. If not, simply tell her, 'It's my way or the highway.' Good luck to you!

To my male reader that is wondering why the gal you met at a bar, thru online dating is not returning your e-mails. You wonder why she doesn't want to see you again? She told you she was upset with the way you treated her. You said you're very attracted to her? Please read what you wrote to me. You invited her to meet for drinks & appetizers? You ordered a club sandwich with french fries & a large salad? You ate the whole sandwich & salad in front of her? You offered her 5 French fries? She had only a cup of coffee? You sat at a bar & talked to other men around you & not to her? Why didn't you offer her a sandwich or something else to eat except 5 French fries? Why were talking to other people while you supposedly went there to get to know her? If the reason is you were nervous on the first date, Then, call her back & apologize. Tell her you'd like to make it up to her by taking her to lunch or dinner. Tell her you'll focus on her & not talk to people surrounding you.

Until next time.. 'Keep Smiling!

Debbie Sue

Send comments & questions to: debrasue-60076@msn.com

Join Debbie Sue & her friends on March 25th for a fun, 'Evening of Comedy & Spoken Word.' At: Euro Echo Café 7919 Lincoln Ave. In Skokie at 7:00 PM.