Tinley Park Mom Aims To Unite Parents Of Neurodiverse Children

TINLEY PARK, IL — A Tinley Park mom hoping to build a support system for parents of neurodiverse children has created an event geared to bring them together.

Ashley Patrick, whose 6-year-old daughter was diagnosed with autism, felt as though Tinley Park events were lacking in more inclusive opportunities for children like hers. She also realized how essential it has been to her, to surround herself with parents who might share in her experiences.

"We wanted to see more inclusion, because it’s our kids’ community, too," Ashley Patrick said. "There’s a lot of times that parents need community, as well, and support."

Patrick, then, began brainstorming ways to connect parents who might otherwise feel alone as they navigate raising neurodivergent children. For those unfamiliar, neurodivergent is a nonmedical term for when someone's brain processes, learns, and/or behaves differently from what is considered "typical." It describes the idea that people experience and interact with the world around them in many different ways; there is no one "right" way of thinking, learning, and behaving, and differences are not viewed as deficits, according to Harvard Medical School.

Raising a neurodivergent child can present unique challenges, Patrick said, and connecting with others can help parents feel less overwhelmed. Patrick has experienced it firsthand.

Following her daughter Gabbi's diagnosis, Patrick was thrust into confusion and overwhelm. Initially, doctors said her daughter might never speak. She realized Gabbi and her family faced unknown challenges ahead.

"I went through a period of depression," she said. "And it didn’t go away until I had people who understand me."

Patrick found comfort in other parents at her daughter's therapy center.

"Having that community around where kids can play, and people understand you, can be important," she said.

Patrick was attending the Tinley Park Christmas parade when she met Cindy O'Boyle. O'Boyle, who is a mom of five, and Patrick connected on the topic of improving inclusivity at Tinley Park events and among the community. O'Boyle is also a candidate for village clerk in the upcoming Tinley Park municipal election. She is running on the Tinley Together Slate.

"I was telling her some of my concerns," Patrick said. "She’s a nurse at Lurie’s (Children Hospital). She was behind it, and she asked what she could do to help."

Patrick created a "Neurodiversity Parent Night," set for 6 to 8:30 p.m. on Feb. 19 at Wingate by Wyndham, 18421 N Creek Dr. The event will include educated speakers and local parents providing their experience, insights, and suggestions in navigating the complexities of parenting a neurodivergent child. The event is free to attend, and includes food.

Patrick is hoping for a relaxed setting, where parents can talk openly.

"I want it to be low-key to where we can sit, have a conversation, and be there for each other," she said. "This is hard to get through sometimes."

The support can be crucial for parents. There are times when her daughter, who is very verbal, has has "meltdowns" in public, she said. What appears dramatic to the neurotypical, is her daughter being overstimulated.

"No one gets that," she explained. "I can reach out to my mom chat and talk, and it’s just good to talk."

Patrick has been an advocate for her daughter and others for years. Her roots in advocacy also trace back to her family.

"I have an aunt that was special needs," she said. "I grew up seeing my family advocate for her my whole life.

"This has been my life. I don’t know any different than advocating for people with special needs."

She's hoping to build up other parents through community, guidance, and connection. She knows so many just want to speak up for their children, and ultimately help others learn about them, as well.

"This is about kids and building our community," she said. " It’s all about teaching each other things. ... It’s all about community."

While Patrick would love to see more inclusivity in town events—like sensory-friendly sessions—she knows that might take time. But this is a starting point.

“'I’ll do it myself,'" she remembers thinking. "I might not be able to make things happen on that level, but I can help build community and let other parents know, there’s people here that understand you.

"If I could make more inclusive spaces for my kid and others like her, I’ll never stop advocating for them."

She hopes to make the event a recurring one, though she's not yet sure of the frequency. Anyone interested in collaborating can reach her at infiniteinclusive25@gmail.com.

"Maybe that’s why God put Gabbi in my life, to continue the fight," she said, of her advocacy efforts. "You’ll fight for your kids. I’ll fight to the death."

Neurodiversity Parent Night

• Weds., Feb. 19
• 6 to 8:30 p.m.
• Wingate by Wyndham, 18421 N Creek Dr.