Bullying and Violence: Could One of our Schools be Next?

Could Our Community be Next?

From Columbine to Sandy Hills, and from Northern Illinois to Virginia Tech, school violence has become a part of today’s culture. While the actual likelihood of a school shooting is very small, it is very frightening. In recent weeks, there have been two separate incidents of threats being made against a local High School. Two weeks ago, there was a threat at the freshman academy. Last week, there was a threat at the main campus where a student had created a “Kill List.” Other students became aware of the list and the author’s intention, and these students brought this information to teachers and administrators. How does a school get to this point?

Bullying

Statistically, most children have been involved in a bullying incidence. They have either been a victim, a bully or a bystander. Nationally, approximately 160,000 children stay home from school each day because they are being bullied. This frightening statistic has long lasting implications. Bullying within the Yorkville School District has been poorly handled for years. The unintended outcome is that the school actually protects the bully more than the victim. A zero tolerance doesn’t mean it’s not happening repeatedly.

Talking with community members, their stories are frighteningly similar. Their child is being targeted by one or more other students. Teachers and administrators are verbally very sympathetic. They will handle it. The bullying continues. More phone calls and meetings. The desire to stop the situation is there, but too often administrators hide behind the privacy of the bullying student. The children quickly realize this. The help that is needed just is not coming. School becomes a terrifying place. The victim wants to avoid school and the danger of the bully. This needs to change.

First we need to understand what bullying is and is not. Bullying is engaging in direct behaviors such as teasing, threatening, taunting, hitting or stealing by one or more students against a victim. This is direct bullying. This is more likely boy on boy bullying. Girls are much more subtle in bullying and engage in indirect bullying. Girls create situations among peers where they can socially isolate the victim. They can do this through rumors, negative attitudes toward a particular student, purposely excluding a single student. Bullying is not a once and done event, but rather an ongoing series of behaviors. They often begin with small actions and escalate, as the bully feels successful or powerful. Bullying causes physical or psychological intimidation. Victims will often feel sick about going to school, suffer from a loss of appetite, change in sleep patterns, and withdraw from social situations.

Cyber Bullying

Sites like Facebook, Twitter, Yik Yak, Instagram, and numerous others are a “wild west” of sorts. The bullies know this. Nasty names and messages are posted about other students. Hundreds of peers can see the post and like it, all within minutes. Schools can and will do very little with cyber bullying. The exception is when the posting is made from school. Otherwise, they do nothing. It’s a painful reality. It is far more effective for the bully to use social media. The audience is much larger and the response time is immediate. Parents, if your child is suffering from cyber bullying, screen shot everything that is being said. Take it to the police and to the administrator. Many times, the only connection between the bully and the victim is that they are in school together. Push the school to document the incident, even if they won’t discipline it. It will show a progression and escalation.

(to read the complete article, http://juliedaniels.hubpages.com/hub/Could-Yorkville-be-Next)