Another ‘Dead’ Deer Not Only Sought Freedom, but Totaled a Car: Editor’s Notebook

This video of a supposedly dead deer springing out of the trunk of a man who intended to butcher it started my day off with a huge laugh – never a bad thing – so I thought I’d share the trip down memory lane that watching the video provoked.

Two deer stories:

First the tale of two drunks, pulled from the Dallas County Sheriff’s Office police log years ago. Seems this couple was driving to Adel from Waukee when they hit a deer on Highway 6, then a two-lane road. Their car, a Ford Escort or something small like that, hit a deer.

So naturally, as any softhearted drunks would do, they loaded the still-alive but unconscious deer into their back seat and headed to the to a vet clinic in Adel with the idea of getting the creature fixed up.

Unfortunately for them but fortunately for the sake of a good story, the deer sprang to life somewhere around Ortonville (where the namesake circus used to winter) and attempted to liberate itself, ultimately totaling the little toy-like car from inside and, if memory serves me correctly, kicking the driver in the head.

The deputy who investigated it said the deer and the people were lucky to get out of it alive, although the driver was ticketed for drunken driving.

The dearer deer story is a confession of my own jackassery – or so it was labeled later by folks who didn’t see the point of what I had done.

I was tooling along one of those winding gravel roads Van Buren County is known for about 12 years ago when a doe dashed in front of my car. I was driving slowly, taking in the breathtaking tapestries of greens that are foothills to the Mississippi River in the spring, so there was no danger my car would strike her.

She was simply part of the picture – until one hind leg became entangled in the barbed wire of a fence, ending a graceful leap that until that moment, seemed as masterfully choreographed as any prima ballerina’s.

"I ... coddled her as I would a frightened child, and to my utter amazement and, truly, complete joy, she stood perfectly still."

It never occurred to me that I shouldn’t help. Or even that I should. I just did.

And it wasn’t easy. Of course, I do not have wire cutters, and even if I had, I’m not sure the farmer would have appreciated it if I’d wrecked his fence to save a deer, a vegetation eating creature that was not particularly loved in that part of the state.

As I approached the deer, she became more agitated and began to wriggle. It wasn't even on my radar that I might suffer the same fate as the hapless drunks who decided to cart the injured deer to the vet.

I lowered my voice to a soft monotone, coddled her as I would a frightened child, and to my utter amazement and, truly, complete joy, she stood perfectly still.

I am not a physically strong person. The prickly wires were stretched taut, and pulling them tighter to create a small opening to free her leg without injuring myself was no easy feat. It took several minutes, during which she stood statue-like and never flinched.

Eventually I was successful and she pulled her leg free.

In the silence of that vibrantly green spring day, she turned and looked penetratingly at me. Our eyes locked for a full five seconds and then she turned and dashed off, graceful as before.

“You’re welcome,” I said and walked away.

Have a beautiful first day of spring.