North Shore Experts Offer Tips For Parents, Students Before College Move-In

MARBLEHEAD, MA — As summer reaches its midpoint, North Shore families preparing to send a child to college for the first time may be facing more than packing lists and move-in dates.

According to Gregg Mulford, clinical supervisor at Marblehead Counseling Center, the transition can unsettle both students and parents as family roles begin to shift.

"It's not surprising that parents and teens often feel insecure and overwhelmed," he said.

Mulford said a student's sense of identity can be shaken when they leave familiar friends and routines behind. He also said the change can be difficult for parents, bringing anxiety, depression, fear about a child's well-being and mixed feelings about new freedom at home.

"In addition," Mulford says, "when parental control starts shifting away from mom and dad, it can feel very similar to rejection."

He said that even though empty nest syndrome is not considered a clinical disorder or diagnosis, it is still a real transition point for families.

The advice from Mulford and Sarah Flatley, president of FlatleyWheaton Educational Consultants and a former assistant dean of students at Harvard University, is to start conversations before students leave home.

"Your goal in sending your child to college is to help them transition to being a capable adult, able to manage their own lives and solve their own problems," Flatley says. "Colleges are filled with trained professionals who can help your young adult thrive.

"It's a pretty safe place to learn these skills."

Flatley says parents should talk openly about communication expectations before move-in.

"Parents are most useful when they help kids prepare for issues beforehand," she said.

She also recommends discussing how a student might handle challenges such as a roommate conflict or disagreement over a grade.

"Role playing or practicing what to say can be helpful," Flatley said.

Mulford pointed to research cited in the article showing one out of two college students reports feeling lonely on campus. The 2025 National College Health Assessment found one out of three had received psychological or mental health services within a 12-month period, and about 45 percent binge drink in order to cope with stress.

For students who may struggle, Mulford said families can plan ahead.

"Talk to your kids before they leave home about becoming overwhelmed," he said. "Strategize about finding support on campus if they need it, staying connected when they’re feeling lonely, and ways to successfully meet others.

"Talking with a mental health professional about their anxiety and brainstorming how to manage can be really beneficial."

Families also should prepare for privacy changes under FERPA, the Federal Educational Rights and Privacy Act. The law means academic, disciplinary, health and medical records generally transfer to the student once they are 18, unless the student signs a waiver for specific access.

"You've gotten your kids to college, which is such an accomplishment," Mulford said. "We know that there are going to be bumps and struggles, but the more you see your role as believing they can do it and supporting their efforts, the better it will be for you both in the long run."