Red Hat Society Helps Women Unite

Dressed head to toe in red and purple garb, "Queen Mom" Nicki Dursi completes the outfit with a red-feathered hat and is ready for an afternoon with her Red Hat Society (RHS) sisters.

As eight ladies are seated for lunch at Via Bologna café in Clarkston, the women recite their pledge to "eat dessert before my meals, if I want to" and a "promise to dispel the notion a woman of my age is old."

Dursi, a White Lake resident for 34 years, defines the Ruby Reds, a chapter out of the Dublin Community Senior Center in White Lake, as a sisterhood of women over 50 whose only mission is to have fun.  

"After all the years that we have worked and raised our families, it's time to sit back and take time for ourselves and our friends to enjoy life," she said. The group allows Dursi, who was widowed in 1998, the freedom to get out and enjoy life among a kinship of like-minded women.

"I can do things with them that I wouldn't want to do on my own," Dursi said. "We've gone to downtown Detroit for outings. It's so much fun and I wouldn't do that by myself."

The ladies, sharply clad in their finest purple and red attire, quickly commence with pleasantries and discuss shopping deals they've found at Costco. Dursi eventually calls order and discusses events the ladies will attend in upcoming months, including a trip to the King's Court Castle at Canterbury Village in Lake Orion and renting a limousine for a day on the town.

Appointed Queen Mom by her fellow Ruby Red "princesses," Dursi was an obvious choice to lead the chapter due to her background as a Walled Lake school teacher at the Community Education Center. As Queen Mom, Dursi is responsible for writing a monthly newsletter and keeping the events organized for all 17 members of the chapter.

"You need to have someone who can pull the group together," Dursi said. "My princesses take turns deciding where we're going to meet next time."

"I think she's wonderful," said Jean Guckian, RHS Princess. "She does a great job and she's always happy."

The group, comprised of White Lake, Commerce Township, West Bloomfield and Waterford residents, convenes every third Wednesday of the month at various restaurants and venues in nearby towns.  

"We care about one another," Dursi said. "And we listen to everything everyone has to say. If there's something going on in our lives, we talk about it. If we don't want to talk about it, we don't."

AlthoughDursi retired from Walled Lake Schools in 2005, she remains active in muscular dystrophy charities and coaches a soccer team for the developmentally disabled program at the Lakes Area Youth Soccer League. 

At 67, Dursi has been known to hop on the back of a motorcycle in full RHS regalia, red boa flying behind her. So long as she's alive, Dursi said, she hopes to be a part of the society.

Proudly displaying a sparkling tiara and a pin with the word Queen on it, Dursi said, "It's time to sit back and smell the roses."