Friday Frivolity.

And now the down side of Spring.

A couple of days ago, I looked at the sunny side of life, a/k/a Spring, wherein I extolled the virtues of this season where we, in a four-season state, wait breathlessly for Mother Nature to toss us a bone to reinvigorate our Winter-weary souls.

Flowers are fleeting, because if the rain keeps pelting down on them, the petals will be dilapidated. The inch of slushy snow that will grace our region tomorrow (more in the northern ‘burbs and mid-state) and the accompanying chilly temps, just might be enough to knock those magnolia buds right off the branches.

Looking ahead at all the rainy weather gives me “the willies”.

While Mother Nature is tormenting us with this incessant bad weather, it is more than just these torrential rains tampering with my walking regimen – the rain is bringing forth all the creepy crawlies.

Last weekend I turned on the hall light in the early morning to see a huge brown spider skittering along the ceiling. For some people, their response is to simply climb on a stepstool with a Kleenex in hand (if they’re brave), or a paper towel (if they’re on the squeamish side or their aim is bad). My mother would grab her mop to knock a spider or centipede down from the ceiling, but often she was not quick enough to squash them on the floor, and, if they landed on the carpet, chances of mashing them to a pulp were slim to none. Then they’d be “at large” and that is even worse. I have always worried that taking a mop or long-handled duster might flip a creepy crawly into my face, or it would land on my hair and I’d likely succumb on the spot.

So that particular spider made a cocoon in the hall, seemingly a perfect chance for me to ambush it while it was relaxing. But no, I thought it might stay up there forever. Of course the next morning it was gone.

That spider, (at least I assume it was the same one), next appeared in the kitchen two days later. I turned the light on in the morning, and it was sitting in the curtain over the sink grinning at me. I let out a little scream and jumped back, so my sudden movement caused it to run down the backsplash and behind the toaster and it didn’t come out again. I guess that’s a snuggly little spot, under the toaster cover. Right then I made up my mind that I’d never make toast ever again, until I saw its lifeless body.

As you know, I work from home and my work station is right at the kitchen table, so that day I spent some angst-filled moments wondering if it might join me over here. My eyes kept glancing over to the counter area wondering if it was similarly sneaking a peek at me?

The more rain we have, the more creepy crawlies. This morning a spider was on the bedroom ceiling and I can only hope this is the same spider traveling around the house. This time I just KNEW it had to be dealt with. In the bedroom, well that’s just a big no-no. Mustering all the bravado that I could, I ran down the hall, grabbed the long-handled duster and unrolled half of the roll of paper towels to attack this beast. Heart pumping, adrenalin flowing, I ran back into the bedroom only to find it gone. OMG! At large in the bedroom! Hastily, since the long-duster duster was handy, I coated it with peppermint oil and swabbed here, there and everywhere all around the house, hoping that scent would cause it to return outside. Now it smells like Starlight Mints all around the house.

It seems the little ants have shown up as well. I can deal with them, though I don’t like having them around. I’ve put out two low saucers of cornmeal and left a drip at the kitchen sink tap so they can promptly eat, drink and instead of being merry, they’ll explode. Yes, even me, the nature lover, would be okay with this happening.

Back in the Summer of 2017, I decided to get whole-house insulation. I was tired of kitchen cabinets on the outside wall side that were freezing all Winter and sweltering hot all Summer. I researched to determine the best type of insulation and decided on a company that uses two kinds of product, and tailors it to different areas of the home. When the salesman came to the house, I was already sold on the idea of getting insulation, but I let him do his spiel anyway. At the very end, he said “and I have an added bonus that will make you very happy – I assume you’re like most women and hate bugs, right?” I emphatically responded “yes – I’m scared to death of centipedes and spiders and consider them the bane of my existence!” He laughed, then told me the cellulose insulation had special properties that were a natural bug repellent and I’d never see another bug in the house again. “So where do I sign?” I asked.

Well, that big job was done in early June 2017, and, not only did I have a colossal mess which took me every weekend in June and July to clean up, but I’ve had more creepy crawlies than ever before, including this creature that I found on my bar of gelatin hand soap in the bathroom last Spring. I almost had a heart attack when I saw it, but still had the presence of mind to photograph it in case it became the subject of a blog post one day. (Yup, pretty shameful on part.)

I studied this creature, then steeled myself with a wad of paper towel clutched in my now-sweaty palm, but I could not squash that THING to save my life. Even seeing the photo now just makes me shudder. So instead, I grabbed a plastic bowl from the kitchen and covered the entire soap dish. I figured the bowl would suffocate that centipede and I’d dispose of it the next day.

I pushed it to the far corner of the vanity out of my sight (but not out of my mind). I even weighted down the bowl with a ceramic soap dish. That centipede lingered not only a day or two, but weeks. I’d turn the light on in the bathroom and it would scurry around the rim of the bowl like a race horse around the track oval. I wondered if this was to taunt me?

Finally it died and I scooped the entire contraption into a garbage bag and ran it outside as soon as possible, lest it was playing possum.

I absolutely hate that this towering human is reduced to hyperventilation by the mere appearance of a critter with multiple legs, that runs faster than she does, but it is what it is. And believe me, I get no sympathy from anyone around me who is interested in slaying these beasts either. Sigh.

I hope the weather improves, and no more torrential rain, just the garden-variety type of rain, so I can (maybe) venture out in my new waterproof walking shoes and walk with the worms.

[Image of raining cats and dogs from Pinterest]

You can catch up on my blog posts before I started blogging at Patch in August 2013 by going here: http://lindaschaubblog.net