Parents of Summer Birthday Kids Often Face a Tough Choice

 As a winter baby, I used to wish I’d been born in the summer, when birthday parties were more fun and it was still light out past 5 p.m. on your big day. For parents, however, having a summer baby (as two of my three children are) brings about the often-difficult decision of when to send the little darling off to kindergarten. It is becoming increasingly popular to “redshirt” a summer birthday child for an extra year, and some school districts around the county actually have created specialized pre-school programs within the district just for such children. However, this doesn’t mean it’s the right decision for all summer birthday kids, or even for the majority.

Keeping the individual child in mind is key, rather than advocating for either option as a one-size-fits-all approach. Here’s a sampling of what some local parents who faced this decision have to say on the subject: how they made the decision and how it turned out for them.

 Option 1: Send the 5-year-old

 Emily Olin boarded the school bus for the first time less than three months after turning five, a decision her mother, Angie, said they made the previous winter with the caveat of getting positive feedback from her preschool teacher at the end of the year before feeling set in their decision.

Being a little sister played a big role in the decision to send her, Olin said, since Emily had spent years copying her older sister through her journey through preschool and early elementary, and she learned things quicker than her first daughter did by following her lead.

 Though Olin cited Emily’s maturity level and necessary skills as the first indicators of school readiness, she said her daughter’s tall stature also played a role in the decision. Though she said it may sound odd, she knew that her daughter’s size would be much more noticeable if she were the oldest in her class, and she didn’t want Emily to feel out-of-place socially among her peers.

 Having Albertville Primary serve as an all-kindergarten school put Olin’s mind at ease that Emily could repeat kindergarten without the traditional stigma of repeating a grade if she struggled more than they anticipated.

 “Those kindergarten classes get dispersed amongst all the different schools and then all the different classrooms when they go to first grade,” Olin noted, “so I knew that we could hold her back if need be and people likely wouldn’t even notice because of the way the schools are structured.”

“We have no regrets,” she said of their choice. “I feel like she was very successful.”

Not every story is a happy ending, though, whichever way you decide to go. Another STMA area family, who preferred to remain anonymous, said they thought their summer birthday boy was more than ready to attend kindergarten when he was five, but have since felt regret at their decision.

“By second grade you could start to see the difference between him and some of the older kids in his class as far as maturity level and focus,” his mother said.

She went on to say that they have been struggling with these issues for the past couple years and seriously considered having him repeat second grade, but they didn’t want to embarrass him or leave him vulnerable to cruel comments from peers.

“So far it is working out, but not without a lot of work on our part to help him through some of his struggles,” she added.

Option 2: Wait until age 6

Brandi Merfeld’s daughter, Kali, will be turning five next month, but she won’t be heading in the doors of Albertville Primary just yet. After a lot of consideration, the family decided to wait an extra year.

Merfeld was quick to point out that the decision they made for their daughter isn’t the right one for every child, but she thought it might be helpful to share some of the things they took into account while making the decision.

“It was a tough decision,” Merfeld said. “We wavered back and forth for a long time.”

Based on the checklist of things to look for in regards to kindergarten readiness, she said her daughter appeared on paper to be ready to go.

However, the couple looked into the future and wondered whether Kali would be developmentally ready to learn algebra as one of the youngest students in her class, or if she might be able to make some better decisions socially by being a little older. They also considered the thought of her going off to college right after turning 18 versus being 19 when she moves away from home.

“Those were the considerations that actually made our decision to not send her,” Merfeld said. 

She added they also had to put a lot of thought into where they could send Kali during that extra year at home so that she wasn’t getting bored. They opted for a different childcare arrangement for the coming year so their daughter would be more challenged.

“I definitely don’t think there is a right or wrong answer,” Merfeld said. “It depends on what you feel is right for your child, and you’ll just know. I feel good about the decision to not send her.”