Seeking Out Silence

Silence is a powerful noise.

Recently, recognizing that a stressful situation was about to push me over the edge of sanity, my sisters booked me a weekend away.

It wasn’t a weekend designed for shopping, gabbing with a sister or dinners out. It was a very different type of getaway.

I spent two nights at Windridge Solitude, a Catholic retreat center located in Lonedell, Missouri. Only about 60 miles from my house, I was shocked to find myself out in the country when I arrived.

I stayed in a small cabin free of television, telephone and Internet access, located on about 85 acres. The only other people on the property were a couple of nuns, whom I only encountered if I sought them out. I was very much alone. One of the nuns loaded my things from the car into an all-terrain vehicle and drove me out to the cabin.

When I arrived at 11 a.m. on Friday, I had a hard time settling down. For a busy mom, silence and rest are so unusual that we don’t know what to do with them. In fact, I kept thinking I was hearing music or distant conversation because my ears were so unused to silence.

The cabin had a full kitchen for cooking and a screened-in porch. True to its name, Windridge Solitude has an almost constant breeze, and when sitting on the porch I felt like I was inside one of those relaxation noise machines.

It was a warm weekend, but I prefer breezes to air conditioning, so I enjoyed opening all of the many windows in the cabin and feeling the fresh air.

One nice surprise happened on Friday night. The entire cabin was fitted with practicality, from the sturdy, simple dishes in the cabinets to the large navy curtain panels designed to keep out the sun. But when I climbed into bed on Friday, I pulled back a simple cotton comforter to find satin sheets. I dove in and slept for many hours.

On Saturday morning, watching a turtle make its way across the field next to the cabin mesmerized me.  

I had an opportunity to make own my way around the property that afternoon, and took a long hike. I had my five-month-old with me, and I tied her up in my baby wrap and we trekked all over the land. I always love to hike, but this may have been my first time hiking alone. It was so relaxing.

On Sunday morning I attended Mass at the tiny chapel on the property. I am not Catholic so I was a little hesitant to join the priest and the five nuns who worship there together. But it was a wonderful experience. They sat in a companionable circle discussing scripture and harmonizing choruses together and I felt right at home.

If you are a mom who is dealing with a stressful time, or just the everyday pressure to raise your family, I really recommend choosing a retreat center like this for a getaway. It is hard to describe the level of relaxation I felt.

I enjoy being in a lot of activity and on the drive to Windridge Solitude, I wondered how I would fill my time or if I would feel uneasy at night. Mostly, I feared that I would miss my family. However, when Sunday arrived, I had to promise myself I would come back to get motivated to leave.