The Policy Making Mehlville School District Parents Mad

I try to be a reasonable parent. I try to be supportive of my kids’ schools, throw in a few donations of paper cups, volunteer at a few events if I can, and keep my mouth shut if there’s a policy I don’t particularly like. However, when I saw the flier advertising the new birthday treat policy for the Mehlville School District, I found myself reacting with indignation. 

After emailing my son’s teacher at Bierbaum Elementary to be sure I understood the policy correctly, I was frustrated. It seemed to be pretty controlling. I threw the question out on Facebook to see if any of my friends had the same reaction to the policy. 

The Policy

The district now requires that all classroom party birthday treats be ordered two weeks in advance from choices listed on a flier which includes both snack and drink options. The prices range from 25 cents to 75 cents for each item. Children are no longer permitted to bring in packaged treats from home to celebrate their birthdays to adequately protect children with potentially dangerous food allergies. 

What Parents Are Saying

My Facebook friends residing in the district reacted strongly to the policy as well.

“I think it’s ridiculous,” said Mehlville parent Scot Sullivan. Parents were unhappy with the two-week order requirement, saying that their lives are too hectic to be sure that birthday treats are arranged two weeks in advance. 

I contacted Tori Behlke, PTO president at , who has organized a petition against the policy. Behlke believes that the district’s policy is overreaching, creating a zero-tolerance environment where families’ rights were being eliminated in an overly controlling allergy prevention policy. 

She also noted, “The letter district parents received from Director of School Food and Nutrition Services, Katie Koester, also mentioned issues of health, wellness and fairness, but the district has no credibility here since they serve four flavors of sugared milk at lunch and still offer items such as Cheez-its, blueberry muffins and chocolate chip chewy granola bars for purchase from the Mehlville school district for birthday celebrations. Some of these items contain allergens and are no healthier for students than a traditional birthday treat.” 

Another parent, Karin Jackson, pointed out that while the district cites the singling out of kids with allergies as a reason to implement the policy, the foods offered don’t necessarily prevent this problem of isolating certain kids. Jackson noted that kids with orthodontia will be excluded when popcorn is ordered from the menu as a birthday treat.

Jackson also said, as a parent of a daughter with dietary restrictions, that she doesn’t believe it’s altogether negative for kids with special situations to learn to handle these types of limitations. If parents are informed about allergens, it should be a rare case that kids are singled out and are not permitted to participate in eating the treat.

Mehlville School District Weighs In

I spoke with Katie Koester, director of food and nutrition for the Mehlville School District. I expected, given my thoughts about the policy, that it might be a tense conversation, Koester not only answered my concerns, but seemed to empathize with parents' frustrations over the change in birthday treat policy. 

I asked, what led to the development of this specific policy? There’s nothing in the Department of Elementary and Secondary Education (DESE) regulations that specifically call for birthday treats ordered from the district. 

Koester explained that she does understand that this policy is on the more cautious side. When the district developed the Wellness Policy that was required this year, it was up to administrators to develop a specific plan to address allergies.

While the district never wants to regulate what kids bring from home in their lunchboxes, the problem existed when kids brought in food to distribute to other kids. She and Dr. Scott Hayes, the director of special services, worked together on the policy, trying to create a plan that would protect kids with allergies and not overwhelm school nurses. 

The two directors talked with other districts to find out what plans they were following, because every district that receives the benefits of DESE must come up with allergy prevention plans. Some districts are following a less restrictive plan, such as asking parents to deliver treats one day in advance so that nurses can look over nutritional information and detect possible allergens. 

Koester said that she and Dr. Hayes determined that this type of plan is not the best choice for Mehlville in terms of efficiency. Managing birthday treats at a school like , where ­­­­more than 600 students attend, can be extremely time-consuming for nurses who have other responsibilities. 

She also noted that while other districts may not be using the specific plan that Mehlville has implemented, they are all headed in this same direction to provide the best protection for children in their care. 

The district provides the treats at a cost, but they do not create any income for the district.

The foods listed on the birthday treat list still contain allergens. What about kids with gluten, milk or egg allergies? I asked. 

It would be impossible, Koester said, to eliminate every allergen from any menu. However, the order form does protect students who are most likely to have a life-threatening allergy, which usually come from peanuts or tree nuts. In addition, nurses keep the nutritional information on hand and are able to respond quickly if a reaction does occur.

I asked about the two-week ordering period. Is a kid out of luck if his mom isn’t on time with the order?

The two-week order period is to give the district some time to put the order together, but Koester said that they are happy to work with parents who miss the two-week window in order to ensure that their kids have a birthday celebration. She said that she has even run to Sam’s already this year to make sure a kid had their treats when a mom called just one day before the birthday.

The treats on the list aren’t particularly healthy, nor are they particularly fun. This new policy seems bland in the choices offered, I said.

The options offered come from the Missouri Eat Smart guidelines, and the Mehlville School District adheres to the intermediate level of food choices. Koester said that the district doesn’t want to offer sugary cupcakes because most families do that type of thing at home. The district wants to meet parents halfway between celebration and the Missouri Eat Smart guidelines.

As far as making birthdays fun, Koester encourages the schools to get creative. One school is working on making decorated tubs, a sight that will alert the kids that a birthday treat has arrived and get them excited. Another is decorating a special birthday cart that the kids will love to see arrive outside their classrooms.

I see that peanut butter is offered in the cafeteria every day. Why is the district targeting birthday treats instead of ridding the cafeteria of top allergens? 

The district is certainly targeting peanut butter in the cafeteria, among other allergens. Peanut butter is a major commodity offered by the DESE lunch program, along with some other staples, such as rice and pasta. However, Koester's department is working toward replacing peanut butter with sunflower butter throughout the next year or so to make the cafeteria safer for kids with peanut allergies. Other plans in the works include creating a peanut-free zone in cafeterias and designating products on the menu that contain peanuts with a peanut icon.

I’m sure administrators are aware that there is a petition aimed at the withdrawal of this policy. How would parents signing the petition impact the policy?

The district seems to believe that this is a case where the desires of the majority cannot overtake the need to protect the safety of the minority. Though there may only be 10 to 15 children in a school with severe allergies, the district must take steps to protect them, even if it is a difficult adjustment for the other students.

Living With Allergies

I contacted a Mehlville parent of a child with severe peanut and tree allergies to get her thoughts on the previous practices of the district, the new policy, and what she would like other parents to consider about the policy. The parent wished to remain anonymous to protect the privacy of her son.

When I asked the parent about her experiences with the previous treat policy, she expressed that there were multiple problems that affected her child. Often, when another parent arrived unexpectedly with treats for the class, her son was either given pretzels from the nurse’s office or even removed from the classroom while the class enjoyed ice cream, doughnuts or cupcakes.

When it came to class party time for Halloween or Valentine’s Day, her family incurred extra expenses when they volunteered to provide the treats to avoid any allergy problems for their child. When parents showed up at the party with additional food, some were very accommodating when she explained the situation, and others did not handle it well.

She and her husband “truly empathize with these parents who are upset by these policies as we remember an even simpler time when a parent could bring for a birthday party cookies or cupcakes from home that had been made with their child the night before.”

However, she believes that parents’ creativity can be funneled into other areas that make parties truly memorable for the kids, such as inventing crazy games or doing fun crafts with them.

“We have faith in the parents of the Mehlville school district and believe that if they seek to understand the reasons behind these policies and educate themselves regarding the issue of food safety and inclusion of all children, that they will be less frustrated and upset by this policy and maybe even become champions of the policy,” she said.

“Lastly, as a district, we talk about community engagement and character building, but do we really walk the talk when it comes to our own schools and classrooms? Community engagement starts in our very own school buildings. These policies and practices provide a wonderful opportunity for us as parents to set good examples for our children in the way of learning about others and the challenges they face, taking care of our friends and being a gracious host/guests.”

A New Perspective

Talking to Koester really helped me gain a better understanding of the policy. If my child had life-threatening allergies, I would certainly appreciate the district taking the most careful route possible, even if it seemed like an inconvenience to others.

I also agree with the parent whose child has severe allergies and sees this as an opportunity for parents to model the character they want to see in their kids. I want my kids to know that we think of others before ourselves, even when it’s not convenient or we think there might be a better way to handle the situation.

When the policy first arrived at our house, my husband listened to me express my negative views on it, and then he gave me a funny look and said, “So what? It affects you once a year.”

I’m starting to see his point. It really does affect me just once per year, as opposed to the kids with allergies, who are affected every day. And let’s face it, the kids just don’t care that much.

There one aspect of the issue I have a hard time getting over. It would be reasonable for the Missouri Eat Smart program to allow some room for school celebrations in their food guidelines. As I heard Koester say multiple times, there is room in a healthy diet for all foods in moderation. The guidelines for Missouri Eat Smart don’t seem to reflect that wisdom when it comes to treats offered on the order form. I am all for healthy foods being served in the cafeteria, but when it comes to birthdays and class parties, let’s allow the kids have a cupcake.

My son’s class had a birthday last week, which I discovered when I asked him about the empty water bottle I pulled out of his backpack. He told me that they had Goldfish crackers, too. I asked him if that was fun and he said, “Well, I was pretty hungry.”

I don’t think he cares much either way, but I couldn’t help the sarcasm in my head, thinking, “Gee, nothing says party like water and Goldfish.”

But now, I'm on board. I learned a lot this week about the importance of asking the right people the right questions when there is frustration over a district policy. If you are a parent who is feeling confused or upset about the new birthday treat policy, I encourage you to call Katie Koester at 314-467-5254. She spent almost an hour explaining the intricacies of the policy to me and welcomes calls from parents. And, as in almost any situation in which we are trying to gain understanding, email is good, but a phone call is better.

For more information about the Food and Nutrition Department, including a link to the birthday treat order form, please visit the Mehlville School District website.