Love in the Time of Zombies

I love a good horror movie.  I grew up watching all of them.  Nightmare on Elm Street.  Friday the Thirteenth.  Halloween.  As a kid, I loved the scare and gore. As an adult, I’m drawn to a different element entirely: the element of survival. 

Who will survive the horror?  Who will be resourceful enough to make it out alive?  Regardless of the enemy, the goal is the same:  to survive; to wait for rescue; or to be the hero. The characters in these movies are all living in survival mode, and this is the element that I think all of us can relate to. 

We may not be doing battle with zombies, running away from ax-murderers, or trying to figure out how to do life in a post-apocalyptic wasteland, but on a daily basis, many of us live life in survival mode. 

Our schedules keep us running from sun up to sun down to meet all of our obligations.  Financial and career fluctuations rob us of a real sense of security.  And familial struggles can make home feel like one more battlefield, rather than a place of rest. 

Trying to describe survival mode is a bit tough.  Yes, it includes the number of activities, obligations, and demands that one must carry out on a daily basis.  But it’s also a frame of mind, a perspective, that says “I’m alone in all of this.  It’s all up to me.  This family/business/relationship won’t work if I’m not on my game 24/7.  I can’t stumble.  I can’t fail.” 

The easiest way to identify it is through the words of people who live in survival mode.  When asked, “how are you doing,” often the reply of one living in survival mode is “Barely makin’ it…fighting to keep my head above water…struggling…overwhelmed…exhausted.”  (As a side note, I now hear more and more kids and teenagers using these words.  It’s not just adults who feel as if they are living in survival mode.  Our kids are feeling it now, too.) 

And just as it does to the characters in these movies, living in Survival Mode takes its toll. Relationships with friends, spouses, and kids flounder for lack of time and emotional energy.  We lose our identity to the roles we are fulfilling. 

Joy and Rest are sacrificed to “Go” and “Do.”  We feel paralyzed and powerless against the circumstances around us, and find it impossible to adapt to a changing situation, so we just react. We lose flexibility.  We lose the opportunity and ability to live well and love fully. We lose what it means to be fully human.  We lose ourselves.     

This is where the picture of a zombie apocalypse is perfect.  When you lose a battle with a zombie, you become a zombie.  So, there are really only three ways out of a zombie apocalypse.  Keep fighting to remain human.  Bow out of the fight entirely.  Or become a zombie. 

These are the same options that are open to all of us living in the real world.  We can fight to remain fully human, fully ourselves, in the midst of the chaos around us.  We can bow out of the fight; numb the pain; check out of those places and relationships and struggles that are too hard.  Or we can lose ourselves to the onslaught; become like the rest, carrying on only the most basic functions of life, but not really living.

So, is it possible to do more than just survive our lives?  Could we actually begin to thrive?  The answer is “yes,” but I think that in order to be fully human, fully alive, we must be able to do the following:  Reflect, Repent, Relate Whole-Heartedly, Respond Flexibly, and Rest. 

The problem is, survival mode inhibits, our ability to carry these out.  In the next few posts I will discuss these five vital activities, how survival mode impacts them, and what we can do to get them back into our lives. 

But now, I really want to hear from you.  We all go through seasons of living in survival mode, and for some of us, it’s the only mode we’ve ever run in. Survival mode is isolating.  So, here’s our chance to fight back against that isolation. 

If you’re up for it, please comment below about the things in your life, and your friends’ lives, that keep you feeling like you’re just surviving.  What have you seen survival mode cost you and your friends and family?  What are the things you hear frequently from those that are living in survival mode?  I look forward to hearing from you, and feel free to comment on others’ posts as well.