Inside the Mind of a Stalker

In the course of my educational research I have done extensive studies on cult leaders and other antisocial types who display aberrant forms of behavior. Tonight I looked at the traits of a stalker, a certain kind of sociopath, who himself brings, or wishes to bring indirectly, harm to those with whom he is obsessed. Of course, in this new age of the internet, the stalker may demonstrate his obsessions online. Here is what I found, with  added comments in parentheses.

TRAITS OF A STALKER/SOCIOPATH
From Sky Valley Chronicle

There are some well-known traits - culled from numerous medical papers, medical and psychological research, mass market and trade books and other sources - that apply to many, if not most sociopaths/stalkers.

These common-thread traits eventually bring about their downfall into the hard reality and harsh light of the criminal justice system.

These traits include:

"~ Poor to no behavioral control/strong impulsive nature. Rage and abuse is a typical trait of the sociopath. Sociopathic stalkers believe they are all-powerful, all-knowing and entitled to every wish. Such people have no sense of personal boundaries and no concern for their impact on others. To a sociopath he or she is always “the smartest guy in the room,” and can outwit all others."  (You may know them to be persistent know-it-alls who name-call and deride in public at the first chance.)


"~ Manipulative and Cunning. Stalkers/sociopaths never recognize the rights of others. They see their self-serving behaviors as always permissible. Sometimes they may be charming yet they are almost always hostile, angry and domineering when their true nature is exposed.  They see their victims as merely an instrument to be used. They enjoy the sense of domination they feel from humiliating, taunting and hurting others." (This is also the hallmark of a control freak)

"~ Grandiose Sense of Self. A sociopath feels entitled to certain things as "their right." A sociopath feels it is their right to abuse those they wish to abuse simply because they enjoy doing it and can do it. In this sense the mind of the sociopath is little different than the mind of a serial killer or serial child abuser: they do what they do because they like it, it gives them pleasure, they can get away with it for a while and they feel entitled to do it." (Many sociopaths like to harass their victims in the hopes that others will do their work for them, such as in the case of a male repeatedly following a female online, announcing when he thinks he is sure she is alone, her travel and work patterns, the type of car she drives, or even explicitly announcing her address for others to see and act upon. This technique is called the 'dog whistle' and it is intended to terrorize the victim.)

"~ Pathological Lying. Many stalkers/sociopaths are chronic liars and have been that way since childhood. In fact they lie casually and very calmly. It is almost impossible for them to be truthful on a consistent basis. They often believe their lies as “the truth.”  They often create, and get caught up in, a complex belief system about their own powers and abilities. A sociopath can be extremely convincing at times (for short periods at any rate) and is even able to pass lie detector tests in some instances." (This accounts for why many people are taken in by sociopaths, become their allies, only to become victims themselves.)


"~ Complete lack of remorse, shame or guilt. A sociopath does not have these emotions – they are just not there - thus they cannot feel things like shame or guilt or remorse. To a sociopath these things simply do not exist in their mental framework as a check on behavior as they do in “normal “humans." (Not much can be done to stop their seemingly childish behavior until it is too late and someone has actually been harmed.)


"~ A deep-seated rage that lies at their core. A stalker/sociopath does not see others around them as people, but only as targets and opportunities.  Instead of friends, they have victims and sometimes accomplices who always end up as victims in the end. To a stalker the end always justifies the means and they let nothing stand in their way of obtaining their goals which is why it is important to put them behind bars where they belong." (While this type of personality may not commit illegal acts directly, they use 'triggers' that we call 'dog whistles' that may prompt others to do the deeds. They are the ones who end up having to appear in court.)

"~ Very shallow emotions. At times some sociopaths can express what appears outwardly to others to be warmth, joy, love and compassion. However this is nothing more than a modeled behavior – something they learn how to do and do well in some cases – and it always serves an ulterior motive. The typical stalker/sociopath is outraged by insignificant matters – such as a newspaper article or book or TV broadcast they feel insulted them or slighted them in some way – yet interestingly the sociopath remains unmoved at all by what would upset a "normal" person."  (If this type of person has befriended you, it's for a reason.. but if he discovers there is nothing in it for him, he will easily turn on you.)  

"~ Incapacity for love. A sociopath is incapable of feeling love, in the traditional sense, for anyone or anything. You will never find a sociopath helping out at a local food kitchen for the needy or doing something positive in a community as a volunteer unless it serves an ulterior motive for the sociopath." (Out for himself)

"~ Cowardice. This is one of the major traits of a stalker/sociopath, on the street or online, for people who are not cowards have no need or desire to engage in aberrant, stalker behavior.  Stalking is the perfect domain of the coward for above all the coward seeks to avoid personal responsibility for his or her behavior." (Once again we refer you to the 'dog whistle' technique, where the stalker hopes that his actions will incite retribution by others, thus keeping his own hands clean of any wrongdoing.)

Some famous people throughout history haven been considered to be sociopaths (many politicians come  to mind) but we suspect everyone knows or has known someone like this in his or her own life.