Yes, There Are Sharks in the Ocean. So What?

"Are there Sharks out there?"

I wished I had a dime for every time some person asked me this question as I stood on the beach getting ready to paddle out, or was coming out of the water. Or, if I am at a dinner party, or some other gathering where the curious about our beaches and oceans have come together to mix it up with those of us who are familiar with the Atlantic.

I have the same answer that I have used for years now.

"Go down and stick your finger in the water and taste it. If it's salty, then there's sharks out there!"

I mean come on people. Every year it seems the beaches are
put on full red alert every time a dorsal fin breaks the surface. There are sharks in the ocean. They live there. They hunt there. There have been sharks out there for hundreds of thousands
of years. Long before we donned our swim trunks and bikinis sharks have lived and existed off our coastline. They are the REAL locals.

And guess what? There are Bears in the woods too! OH noooo!

But if someone can point out where anyone from New England has been killed by a shark in recent times I'd like to see it. I
know there was one case in 1936 in Mattapoisett, where some poor guy was eaten by a Great White while swimming in a cove. But that was 75 years ago. That was extremely rare. That shark was more than likely lost and it was probably past his dinner time. So he just ate the first thing that swam by him. Some bony ass white dude, that more than likely gave that poor
White Shark heartburn.

Because as a rule, sharks don't like the taste of us.

In fact, most shark attacks are due to mistaken identity. They usually end up with the shark spitting out that awful human taste. Though at that point, the damage from the strike is already working against the victim. Again, sharks hate the way human beings taste. Unless you coat yourself with fish chum, or hang slabs of beef around your neck while you are out swimming, you are simply not going to attract any dangerous sharks.

And by now, you should all know that Sharks are fond of feeding on Seals. So if you happen to be frolicking in the ocean, and you notice a bunch of healthy plump seals nearby, might I suggest you exit that area. The Shark is looking for seals. Not you.

Though it has been proven that surfers and boogie boarders do take on the silhouette of seals from the shark's perspective when he is coming up and underneath you. Face it. Surfers look like seals. You can't blame the shark for mistaking your silly ass for a seal now can you? Besides, the second that shark realizes he bit into something other than a seal he is spitting that disgusting taste out of of his mouth. So you lose an arm or a leg in the process. Just a case of mistaken identity. Nobody at fault here.

If you really want to avoid getting bit by a shark use this rule.

"Always go into the water, with someone who swims slightly slower than you. " Figure it out.

JAWS was a movie. It never really happened. Yes there are sharks out there. But honestly? Closing the beaches because some basking shark or nurse shark swam by? Or some harmless sand shark was spotted? Hell even the Blue shark is not looking for little Timmy and Susie. They live here. Lighten up everyone.

If I may quote the late Rodney King...."Can't we all, jest git
along...? Can we jest git along?" Yes Rodney we can.

I can't wait to go for a swim or a surf. Just gotta remember not
to act or look like a seal.

We lost another TV icon last week. Ernest Borgine (Middle)
from the hilarious TV show in the 60's "McHale's Navy"
passed away. He was born in 1917 and passed on July 6th at the age of 95. That's a great run for anyone. 95 years on planet earth. That show McHale's Navy was the South Pacific's WWII take on Hogan's Heroes that took place during the European campaign in WWII.

Not that there was anything funny about WWII.

At the time both these shows ran, I can remember my late father a WWII vet laughing his head off. So I guess they struck a chord with a lot of WWII vets. And The baby boomers too. Rest in Peace McHale.

There's another passing to make note of. Local surfer Tyler Moore and his wife Susan gave birth to their first daughter on July 6th 2012. Elizabeth Lylah Moore was born at 12:33PM.
She passed at 5:17 PM. Five hours later.

It's hard to put into perspective what that all means. Five hours.

As a parent and a surfer (as I am sure all of you who are the same can relate to this) I know of the many months of "nesting" that takes place in the home prior to that big day. It is such an emotional and physical transition that takes place, that it is hard to describe it to anyone who has not participated in the nesting process. Trust me, it's big.

It does seem beyond tragic on the surface. And none of us have any knowledge of why and how these things happen. For those of us with faith, we have a slightly better handle on it. That pain and lost will not go away overnight. What we do know as surfers, is the healing process that the ocean has. I hope that Tyler finds his way back into the line-up soon, and Mother Ocean can do her part in helping with the lost of a life that had just literally begun.

Little Elizabeth Lylah Moore...may you rest in peace. And to Tyler and Susan, on behalf of the entire Surf Community, our thoughts and prayers and well wishes are with you. May God Bless you all.

"Surfing Heals All Wounds..."

Now for Some Of My Weekly Global Observances:

I had to do a double take last week when I saw Mitt Romney speaking
at the NCAA P. Are you kidding me? Though I guess I would give him credit for just showing up. But you have to wonder what would of happened had he not showed up. It was a clear no win situation.

Even Obama himself will not be speaking to the NCAAP. He's sending
his sidekick Joe Biden. Who will no doubt stick at least one of his big feet in his mouth. Politics sure is crazy.

Kalid Sheik Mohammed (KSM) the Mastermind behind 9/11 is still in jail at GITMO. He is still looking for a hair stylist. Meanwhile a family of ferrets have moved into his beard.

Note to self: Must pick up Rat Poison at Home Depot.

So long Ray Allen...though five years was not enough for most Celtic fans. Going to the Miami Heat. Hope you get another ring. We were all just hoping it was with us.