MY DAD

I’m so lucky to have such a wonderful dad.  I don’t always tell him how lucky I feel, so knowing he reads the Windham Patch every day, this seemed a great opportunity to tell him how much he’s loved.

My father, Jerry Neal, married my mother Judy back in 1968.  A year later I was born and then my sister arrived two years after me.   Prior to marrying and starting a family, my dad fought in Vietnam and earned a Purple Heart.  Always a humble man, this was something he never told my mother, until one day she found the Heart buried deep in a hope chest.  After the war, he landed a job at IBM and then worked his way up, starting in the mailroom and ending at the top in management and sales.  Despite his stressful job and ridiculously long commute, I don’t ever remember him complaining.  Instead, I only think back to how happy he was to arrive home.  There, he enjoyed spending time with us, and he was always our “go to” when it came to schoolwork.  I can remember sitting with him, working on extra practice sheets from workbooks, and how from very early on, he stressed the importance of education and college.  He always told us when you set your mind to something, as long as you’re willing to work hard, anything is possible. 

Raising my sister and I was definitely not an easy job.  Early on, attending dance recitals, gymnastics meets, field hockey games…that was the simple stuff, and he never missed any of it.  The tough stuff came later, like when he passed my 15-year-old boyfriend (now husband) as he was taking a joy ride in my mother’s car.  Or maybe he found one of my sister’s arrests during high school more challenging.   Even in circumstances like these, we knew he’d forgive us.  He was way too patient and I’m afraid we took him for granted.  Always in the end, we knew his love was unconditional and no matter what trouble we might get ourselves into, we could always count on him.

As years passed by, my mom and dad continued to model marriage at its best.  I honestly don’t remember them fighting (probably just not in front of me or my sister), and I only recall how good and kind and loving they were.  To this day, 45 years later, my parents adore one another and spend all of their time living and working together at their Inn on the Cape.   There is constant needling and teasing throughout the day, and if anything goes wrong my father has come to magnanimously accept that it is likely “all his fault” according to Judy.  My grandfather used to call them Hon and Bun, and I believe he still would today.

I no longer take my Dad for granted.  Rather, as a mother of teenagers, I finally understand just how amazing he was throughout my childhood and adolescence.  It was also during those years when I began to witness his incredible generosity and willingness to give to others.  Then and now, he has always sought ways to help those less fortunate.  He regularly volunteers at the local soup kitchen, he’s been a Big Brother to a lucky kid named Dylan, and he continues to donate to countless charities.  His altruistic nature has taught me so much and so many people have been touched by his compassion, humor, and generosity.  As his daughter, I am so proud of his philanthropic ways.  However, I think the reason I appreciate my dad the most is because of his commitment to his grandchildren.  Madelyn, Emma, Michelle and Miles are his number one priority.  Even though my dad lives on the cape, and runs a Bed and Breakfast (www.isaiahhallinn.com), there’s no stopping him from making the two hour drive to Windham for every single band concert, field hockey or lacrosse game, gymnastic meet, birthday celebration, or simply because we need help.  My dad would do anything for us.  He has always put my needs, and now my own children’s needs before his own. My family and my sister’s family matter more to him than anything in the world.  He appreciates all of us, and I want him to know that even though we don’t always say it, we appreciate him too.  I thank him for all that he does and I want him to know how much he means to me and my sister, our husbands, my mom, and each of his grandchildren.  We are so proud of you and love you more than anything Dad.  Happy Father’s Day.