Response to ongoing and very personal attacks

Recently a resident in town has been commenting in very personal terms about me both at Council meetings and in letters to various publications. There is a lot of history to this. Specifically, when he came before the Council last year and berated us all about not having purchased a fire truck, I e-mailed him because I felt that his comments were inaccurate and did not reflect what was actually happening (including that we were moving forward with the process). He claimed that certain other officials had been the only ones to make progress on the issue - which was absolutely not true and in fact almost the opposite of true. I told him how difficult it was for all of us on the Council to be on the receiving end of this kind of vitriol (versus constructive disagreement or even constructive suggestions, which is fine). I told him that I agreed the process had taken too long but that I personally had been trying to move it forward for years including drafting the Request for Information for a consultant from the hospital.

Every response from him became angrier and more surreal demanding to know why I had not done certain things that were outside of the role of any council member, and telling me that if I couldn't handle criticism I should step down. I finally asked him not to contact me any more as I was struggling with a lot of personal issues and his anger was causing me a lot of upset.

Many months later, this resident decided to come to a council meeting and demand that I read my correspondence to him where I asked him not to contact me. I was not actually at that meeting but at the next meeting I read the letter aloud, which was embarrassing and personal - but also legally public information. (I am well aware that anything I write to a constituent is public information.)

He then told the media that it was "unfair" that I read the letter aloud and handed out the full stack of correspondence between us to provide "context." I don't think the media found any smoking guns in there, and neither can I.

Since then he has continued to come to meetings to talk about "Council Member Mathiasen." I have found this bewildering and personally very painful to experience. With his latest letter sent to the Courier I felt I need to respond.

I am aware that there are some residents who find me to be too outspoken. Some of this I have brought on myself, but some I absolutely feel comes with being a woman who has attributes that are admired in men but condemned in women.

Below is my response to Mr. Penn. I am sure that this will not be the last word on this issue because it is clear that Mr. Penn is someone who absolutely must have the last word. That said, I am done engaging.

I hope that all residents understand that we are elected volunteers and we are not perfect people, but we are all trying our best. When we fall short, we would appreciate a little bit of grace. After all, we are all neighbors and we all care about the same things.

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Mr. Penn is a good human and a hero by any standards, and I am frankly bewildered by his deeply personal animus towards me that goes beyond any specific thing that I have or have not done. He now comes to almost every meeting to target me often in very personal terms and around town he is telling people of his intense dislike for me as a person. It is an extremely uncomfortable position to be in

In terms of the fire truck, there are seven people on our governing body, and since I joined there has been almost 100% turnover. It is accurate that of those 13 people I did work hard (and perhaps harder than most others) to push the fire truck, even though I was not on the public safety committee. I have agreed that the truck took too long (while there are a number of reasons for this). What is bewildering is why the delay justifies personal vitriol towards me as ONE volunteer elected official to the exclusion of all others.

From a responsible governance side, spending $18,000 for a professional fleet consultant to evaluate a potential $3-4 million in potential new fire truck apparatus purchases is not a poor use of funds and is also best practice when expending massive amounts of money - just as we would hire outside consultant to assess a major new sewer expansion or a new well. Contrary to what is stated in the letter, the report did not tell us the same thing as certain members of the fire department had been communicating. And, the report did recommend that we stagger the purchase of two trucks, contrary to what was implied by Mr. Penn in one of his presentations. (Many viewers who watched his public comment also didn't realize that we had authorized one truck at that meeting - instead they concluded from Mr. Penn's statements that none had been or would be purchased.)

On transparency, our former mayor has for some reason been sharing tidbits of information about me with Mr. Penn (none of which I believe are damning in any way) and Mr. Penn is bringing these forwards as some kind of gotcha. If the former mayor - who I have never criticized publicly and who has praised me effusively in the past - has specific concerns, he should share these directly and not through Mr. Penn. It is true the previous mayor believed that he had the unilateral authority to decide what was or was not on the Council agenda, and used this to prevent discussions that he did not want the Council to have. To me that is not transparent (or consistent with the Borough charter, or state law). Fortunately, that is not how we operate today.

When Mr. Penn's wife asked me point blank about Post Office Plaza, I answered honestly even though I knew this answer could be used against me. I also referred her to my nuanced and I hope thoughtful statement from the time of the vote and told her that once the 15 units had been decided our entire Council united around making this happen, even in the face of additional lawsuits.

One of the reasons the Barbie movie resonated so much is because women are under a constant microscope for every element of their behavior, not just what they do but how they do it. To quote a few lines: "You have to have money, but you can't ask for money because that's crass. You have to be a boss, but you can't be mean. You have to lead, but you can't squash other people's ideas ... you have to answer for men's bad behavior, which is insane, but if you point that out, you're accused of complaining." Whether intentional or not, that is my experience when dealing with some of these attacks.

Any woman who has tried to be effective in politics today has to find ways to get things done, but God forbid they take credit for it. And in running for office, they are supposed to tout their accomplishments, but not too loudly lest they be seen as "arrogant" (a quality often admired in men). A few years ago, I wrote a campaign piece laying out my qualifications that included the fact that I earn over $1000 a day providing consulting expertise to municipalities around the country. A man in town immediately contacted me to have coffee so that he could advise me not to show off. (Women who have been told to smile more can relate to this.)

It was notable at the final Council meeting of last year, the three men on the Council praised their own accomplishments and did not recognize the fact that the lion's share of tasks that had been accomplished had been by the women on the Council. In fact, they did not recognize the women at all. (I know one of them reached out later and felt very uncomfortable about this dynamic.) The previous year, the two women running were criticized by their opponents for mismanagement of meetings and schedules (necessitating emergency meetings and canceled meetings) that were wholly under the purview the mayor, a man, and they were left hanging.

Women in every walk of life have had this experience - getting the work done and seeing others taking credit, having their contributions minimized, or making a suggestion at a meeting and having it met by silence until a man makes the same suggestion.

This is not the fault of any individual men. It is a dynamic that underlies business, government, academia, and even home life for many women, even today. It is something that I smile through in my professional life, but not something I think I should have to submit to as a hard-working volunteer, being berated in the most personal terms by people who do not know me.

I happen to love men. I am married to one and the mom to two, and I am proud them and they are proud of me as a tough, assertive, smart woman who fights for what she believes in, something I will continue to do if re-elected.

Jocelyn Mathiasen
Chatham Borough Council