Are You ANGRY!

No one can make another person get angry. No one can make another person call them hurtful names. Anger is controlled (or not) by yourself.  It’s funny, given Webster defines anger as “a strong feeling of displeasure and usually of antagonism”, why do we choose anger?

DIY Stress Relief describes the negative effects of anger as:

• Passive-aggressive behavior
• Stress and muscle tension
• Ongoing thoughts of revenge
• Wanting to turn other people against the person you think has wronged you
• Alienating relationships through angry, adversarial attitudes
• Fear of being attacked in future - always being on alert
• Increased likelihood of heart attack, hypertension and stroke
• Taking out anger on objects or animals and risking damage to both them and yourself
• Increased likelihood of violence and abusive behavior

According to the Better Health Channel, “Anger triggers the body’s ‘fight or flight’ response. The adrenal glands flood the body with stress hormones, such as adrenaline and cortisol. The brain shunts blood away from the gut and towards the muscles, in preparation for physical exertion. Heart rate, blood pressure and respiration increase, the body temperature rises and the skin perspires. …The constant flood of stress chemicals and associated metabolic changes that accompany recurrent unmanaged anger can eventually cause harm …. Some of the short and long-term health problems that have been linked to unmanaged anger include: headache, digestion problems, insomnia, increased anxiety, depression, high blood pressure, skin problems, such as eczema, heart attack and stroke.”

Anger is a bad habit and oftentimes it’s just an excuse for poor behavior. According to philosophy professor Tenzin Norbu in an article about The Spirituality of Patience, “We become angry because of a deluded view we have of ourselves and the persons or things toward which our anger is directed.” Albert Einstein said ““Anger dwells only in the bosom of fools.” My favorite quote about anger comes from Ralph Waldo Emerson who said ““For every minute you are angry you lose sixty seconds of happiness.”

How can we stop this bad habit? There are a lot of anger management techniques. Putting your thoughts into taking deep breaths can help calm your body down because it helps calm the fight or flight syndrome. Think about the event that triggered your anger and how it really impacts your life. For example, when you’re driving if someone cuts you off, yes you had to slam on your brakes and yes you were scared but, unless they caused you to have an accident, it’s over. Breathe and be thankful that’s all that happened.

Likewise, when you read words in an article that trigger your anger, breathe to calm yourself. Think about the words that triggered your anger and how those words impact your life. (More than likely there will be no impact because they are just words.) Then positively assert yourself by clearly expressing your fears or concerns. Clearly expressing thoughts, whether positive or negative is necessary for a thoughtful conversation. Conversely, calling someone a poopie-head never resolved anything.

Last but not least, try to find humor in the situation because laughter always helps. Think of Martians (to honor of the Roman God of anger Mars) ripping the words right off your screen and attaching them to their bodies and then doing your favorite dance on your front yard!

Have fun because enjoying life is definitely much better than having a strong feeling of displeasure and/or antagonism!