Wank's World: What the Heck are the Phillies Doing?

Well, it was a heck of a Thursday night down at the stadium. This one was pretty much over the moment Kyle Kendrick took the mound just a shade after 7 p.m. last night.

Joe Blanton, for whatever reason, was asked to take the ball tonight despite well-documented elbow issues. Ruben Amaro had previously explained the move to stick with Blanton by saying, "We'd rather have Blanton pitch."

That's cool, Ruben. How'd that  one work out for you? Nevermind, I'll just tell you how it went, Blanton never threw a pitch, Kyle Kendrick and Danys Baez combined to allow Jason Giambi to tune the Phillies up for three homers and 7 RBI--the only RBI Colorado collected all night. Jason Giambi? Are you kidding me? 

I refuse to do a standard recap for as long as this offense continues to look like this terrible at the plate. Instead, let's break it down with some news, opinions, and horrible stats.

Let's start with the most pressing issue--Phillies have scored two runs or less in five-straight games. That's awful.

• Everyone is quick to complain about Michael Martinez, Wilson Valdez, Raul Ibanez, and Ben Francisco, and they probably should...but Ryan Howard is now 0 for his last 20 plate appearances. He hasn't had a hit since his three-run homer last Friday against Atlanta. He's hitting .241 this season. If the rest of this lineup is going to tank, shouldn't the former MVP and $125 million first baseman, ya know, carry the team a little bit? Guess not.
• Placido Polanco, after hitting .398 in April, is hitting an abysmal .211 in May. Awesome.
• I don't think you'll see Joe Blanton until July (just a hunch). See you next week, Vance.
• Hey fans, Shane Victorino, a night after providing some hope for a quick return with a sacrifice bunt that helped the Phillies edge Colorado in the series opener, had an MRI Thursday. That MRI revealed a fairly significant hamstring strain, so he'll be placed on the disabled list. Cool.
• For me, the best part of the Victorino injury is that the Phillies waited until Thursday to schedule an MRI for the centerfielder. If a multi-million dollar cog on an already injury depleted team pulls up lame, I'd probably want to be proactive about the situation. Instead, the Phillies let Victorino hang out for four days, used him to lay down a bunt in Wednesday night's win, and then scheduled an MRI. This means that not only did they risk further injury to Victorino by allowing him to play, but now they can't place him on the disable list retroactive to last Saturday. He now will not be available to June 3 at the earliest. Why no rush on the MRI? Couldn't scrape together the cash for the pictures?
• Amaro said after the game that he doesn't anticipate calling up Dom Brown. He better send out a text tomorrow to local media that reads, "J/K. LOLZ." If I have to Watch Mini-Mart roam center much long, I'm probably going to stab somebody. Just kidding. Maybe.
• If you are looking for some good news, Roy Halladay is -180 on the moneyline in Vegas for tonight's game against the Rangers. For Halladay, with this offense, to be -180 against an AL opponent (as you know, the Phillies are terrible against the AL) with a quality left-handed pitcher on the mound, well, that speaks volumes. If the line tells me all I need to know, and in most cases it does, then I'd say that the Phillies will open the series with a win.