All In The Online Family

The electronic age definitely has its advantages and disadvantages when it comes to the way we interact with one another.  But while some aspects of our lives have been made simpler, others have become more complex and demanding. 

Don't get me wrong, being able to e-mail my boss that important file while he is vacationing in the Dominican Republic is a beautiful thing.  However, with all this technology at our fingertips, there's no excuse when things don't get done.

We start to feel pressured and overwhelmed.  It's hard to keep track of our priorities.  And we neglect the truly important things in life.

Where has all the real-life, human interaction gone?

We text instead of call.  We e-mail instead of sending letters and cards.  We "Facebook" and "Tweet" instead of meeting for coffee or drinks.  And while it is convenient and allows us to maintain contact with certain people in certain instances that we otherwise may not be able to, there are certain things that cannot be seen, heard or felt behind a computer or phone.

There's always the concern for things being misunderstood.  You can't detect "tone" from a text.  For example, a friend tells you that he or she got a great new job.  You respond, "Good for you!"  That can be taken as a congratulatory reply, but can also be mistaken as a sarcastic one.  Next thing you know, this friend is not talking to you and telling others what a horrible person you are.

We tend to overuse the famous "LOL" because of two common reasons -- A) we are afraid of hurting someone's feelings, and B) we can't think of anything else to say. Of course, there are those times when "LOL" really means "laughing out loud".

It's not just communication that is affected.  Online gaming has replaced the way we used to "play" or "hang out" with our peers.  Kids don't physically go to the arcades or the parks anymore.  They sit in front of their big screen tvs with a controller in their hands, playing against someone down the block, on the other side of town, out of state or sometimes even across the globe.  Convenient, yes. Fun, probably.  Healthy, not so much. 

You can't high-five your television when you destroy all the evil villains on the planet. You can, however, share a group embrace when you score the winning run on the baseball field.  Not only is the electronic age taking away human interaction, but it's not allowing us to learn some of the core values in life -- teamwork and responsibility.

What about online dating?  Nowadays, you can browse, inquire and "get to know" someone before ever meeting them in person.  People can post anything they want about themselves, but do we even know if it's for real? 

What about these relationships, are they for real?  Are they healthy?

Well, they're real in the sense that they do exist and we are communicating with others, although I'm not sure how healthy they are for us.  If you already know the person pre-texting era, it's not so imperative.  However, this type of communication can be both beneficial and harmful when meeting and interacting with new people.  

You can learn a lot about a person through a text conversation, both good and bad.  For example, some people have this unprecedented sense of confidence behind the 4.3 inch touch screen of their smart phone.  They say things they normally would not have the courage to say to someone's face.  Whether it be a naughty, flirtacious comment or a mean, sarcastic one, they become someone they might not be if not for the security blanket of the text message.  

During a "textlationship" you are basically writing your own little screenplay between yourself and the other person.  You have time to sit and think before responding and can steer an entire scenario exactly the way you want it to go.  So not only can getting to know someone this way be extremely misleading, but it can be very disappointing as well.  You sort of create an image of someone in your mind based on your interaction with them over text.  But exactly how close to reality is that image?  You can't read their body language or look into their eyes to see how sincere they are.

It's evident that social networking has become the "new busy". We spend more time in front of a computer or smart phone than we do with our families.  We believe that if we miss a day on Facebook, we've missed an eternity!  And nobody wants to feel left out of the loop.

Same goes for the retailer who insists on being open for business on Thanksgiving Day. Seriously, with the biggest shopping day of the year the very next day, is it really necessary to take people away from their families on a Holiday such as this? You know the big-wigs are home feeding their faces with turkey and stuffing.  So why make life miserable for your employees -- you know, the ones who actually do the work and run your business?

Our virtual "families" have replaced our real life ones.  I'm guilty as well.  Always on vibrate, my phone is rarely more than an arm's length from me.  I can't miss that important text from you-know-who.  And I can't miss the Facebook comments on the pictures I just posted.

It's all too demanding, if you ask me.  Consider Europe.  They break in the middle of the day to rest and eat and spend time with their loved ones.  Here, we are increasing the workload but the day is still only 24 hours long.  There's no time for ourselves, let alone others.  And who suffers, but our families.