Chuckles the Loon

As the 2011 school season came to a close and the summer fun and vacation times begin, I would like to thank the people who have been reading my blog and to those commenting (yes, even the ones that called me a "Lobotomized Psycho Putz").

And considering the fact that I am looking forward to nights that get dark much later and cooling down with glasses of alcoholic brews topped now off with fruit, and the mind numbing possibility of a winter without a Superbowl, I raise my cup of grog to you and shout, "Cheers, East Meadow!"

However seeing as how I have blogged in the categories of Issues, Politics, Sports, Living ,Education, Comedy, Opinion, Business and  Family I would be remiss if I did not then pass onto this blog the worthy comments that have been made by me and other bar stool philosophers in the places that I like to hang after an evening of Community Patrolling, Strolling or water holing relating to other subject matters like...

Art..."drawing comicbook hero Green Lantern can be as intense as the Mona
Lisa...but creating pictures of Spiderman are easy...especially if you check the web!"

Fashion..."there was a time when Nehru jackets and Bobbie sox were all the
rage, now it's a Gaga meat dress"

Food..."Do know how many eggs actually go into a 12 ounce chocolate egg
cream?"

Science..."The difference between e-Harmony and a neutron bomb is  that
with neutrons opposites really do attract."

Education..."Why do they call it a Tugboat if it really pushes the
barges?"

Automotive..."It is important when talking about rear seat airbags to
make sure you are not discussing your in-laws from Florida."

Homes & Garden..."Isn't it like putting steroids in food if you use
"Miracle Grow"  on your tomato plants?"

Music..."Country music is great if you mention mom, beer, dogs, trucks
and unrequited love. Hip hop songs are great if you mention "The Club!"

Television..."I was watching the new season of Celebrity Rehab and
wondering how old Amy Fisher has to be when they will stop referring to her
as- The Long Island Lolita?"

History..."Were the early days of history called the Dark Ages, mainly
because there were so many knights?"

But my forte (which  is French for "best at putting thy foot
in one's own mouth") when it comes right down to it is Sports. So here are
some questions I was asked recently as I waited for the commercial breaks
to be over or started ordering another round of fermented barley and hops.

For example...                                                                                                  

Why are they called "Stands" at sporting arenas and stadiums when they are
especially made for spectators to "Sit" on?  And ever think that if it wasn't for Baseball scouts treating a young Cuban pitching prospect so badly, that Fidel Castro never would have gone into his second career choice of politics? How good can a "Doctor of Sports Medicine" really be if their diploma on
the wall says they were "home schooled"? Is it mean, if on Fourth of July an adult asks a child ,"if they want to play with matches?" and when the youth agrees, they make them the ball boy at their "Tennis Game"?

The truth is, I joined a Fantasy Football League and  I eventually called the "Online Computer Tech Support." The question is, should I have been insulted when the Rep told me," that my problem was between the keyboard and the chair?

It seems that my family and my esteemed editor ( God bless his easily amused soul) are very pleased with my performance on the blog log so far, as they see that with all this hard work and research, I am having fun and so are the readers. 

So it is at this Time this I  wanted to officially announce that I have gotten my own upcoming HBO special. That's Right! Next month I pay an extra $20 and I get that plus Showtime, Cinemax, Starz, the Game Show Network and two pay-per-view specials to be named later. Hardy, Har har! Chuckles to You!