Dancing With The Bizarres

I don’t know what these TV casting directors are thinking these days, but it is not with the grey matter above their ears.

The internet is all abuzz with the upcoming cast of the very popular TV show, “Dancing with the Stars” and I am all aghast. The rogues gallery that was chosen makes me scratch my head more than an elementary school child with a severe case of head lice. It is one of the largest casts of non-celebrity stars trying for their special fifteen min

utes in the spotlight since Kato Kaelin . It makes me long for the days when Charo (koo-chee, koo-chee) was on Love Boat and Rich “Mr Impersonator” Little appeared on Fantasy Island (Look boss, da plane).

I mean, I kind of suspect what they were thinking with picking Rob Kardashian. That you would have the whole cast of no talent, (except possibly Bruce Jenner) mascara donning, fame crazies in the audience rooting on their least known relative.

But Nancy Grace is just a “Legal Beagle” (a tenacious yapping little mongrel who attacks those who have issues with the law). She is nothing more than a Geraldo Rivera wannabe with female parts and Jennifer Aniston’s old haircut from her “Friends” TV show era.

And an jilted girlfriend of Denny Crane (if you understand that TV show reference). Do they think that Casey Anthony will be in the audience to laugh and cheer when Nancy falls and does a face plant? And then there is George Clooney's ex-girlfriend. What is she number 11 since 2008?

But will somebody please explain to me the “star” status of Chazz Bono. Here is a person (was a she-but is now a he) who’s claim to fame is being the spawn of famous singers and having a radical sex change operation.

My mother-in-law’s hairdresser in Brooklyn can make exactly the same claim, but I bet you have never heard of her (was a he, but is now a she). Somebody get me Ru Paul!

It seems that they are overlooking real celebrities that could use the work and exposure like Donnie Most (Happy Days), Kirk Cameron (Growing Pains), Jodie Sweetin (Full House), Marcia Strassman (Welcome Back Kotter), Rebecca Lobo (WNBA ) and James Hampton (F-Troop).

But instead of those suggested above, the addle brained casting directors of DWTS chose to scrape the bottom of the gene pool/cesspool and choose people with all the star power of Lizzie Grubman.

Lizzie Grubman, if you remember, is a LI “snotty” ,who in a fit of rage drove her SUV into a crowd of people outside a nightclub in the Hamptons. She injured 16 people and was later charged in a 26-count indictment with felony crimes including second-degree assault, driving while intoxicated, and reckless endangerment. Dizzy Lizzie faced up to eight years in prison, but she served thirty-seven days in jail and received five years' probation after reaching a plea bargain. But she was about as celeb newsworthy as Perez Hilton.

I mean, if you wanted to pick people from Long Island that most of us would rather view instead of the psuedo paparazzi snatchers that were chosen and would be much better on DWTS, I would be happy to recommend Matt Serra (MMA), Bobby Nystrom (Pro Hockey), Peter Senerchia (Pro WWE Wrestler-Taz), Beth Ostrosky Stern (film star) and Alexa Ray Joel (music).

Instead of their possible backup choices- if some immitation celeb they chose turns up lame (like in a previous season or two) of Evelyn Schackow (master yodeler) or Russell Hantz (Survivor Contestant). Either way, I bet a slew of my co-workers are still going to waste their time and watch, which will serve them right.