Crisis Averted. Franchise Saved. "Transformers: Dark of the Moon" Review

Who's in it: Shia LeBeouf, Rosie Huntington-Whiteley, Josh Duhamel, Tyrese Gibson, Frances McDormand, John Turturro, Patrick Dempsey, Ken Jeong, John Malkovich

MPAA Rating: PG-13 for intense prolonged sequences of sci-fi action violence, mayhem and destruction, and for language, some sexuality and innuendo.

What it's about: Not like the plot matters or anything, but all is well on Earth for the exact amount of time it takes Sam Witwicky to finish college. After that, it appears the Decepticons (the baddies) have returned, seemingly in cahoots with some humans.

They are after a certain special artifact which happens to be on the dark side of the moon, a place only Buzz Aldrin (who has a cameo) and Big Neil were able to witness. The Autobots race to recover said artifact and return it to Earth, but when they find the secrets behind it, the world of trouble they got themselves into is soon realized.

While on the side, of course, Sam is given a "normal life" plot with everyday problems, including a new girl -- that's right, NO MORE MEGAN FOX. It's O.K. though, New Girl is almost equally as hot and has something Megan Fox doesn't: a Bri-ish accent.

Anyways, from there its pretty much chuckle, boom, laugh, kaboom, giggle giggle, bang, then BOOM BOOM sloooooowwww moooottiiiiooonnn KABLAM!

Voila, you have a Transformers movie.

What I think about it: I'll be frank with you. The first one is better; face it, that movie is tough to beat.

But it's not a big deal because Dark of the Moon is much, much better than its immediate predecessor. This newest installment clocked in at approximately exactly two hours and thirty-seven minutes short. I said "short" because it didn't seem painfully long as the second one did. This one seemed to be better written, better plotted out, and better overall, just as Michael Bay promised.  

It also wisely went back to the roots of the franchise in many aspects, one being that the final fight was in a major city, whereas last time it was in the middle of the desert. It's things like that that give make you nostalgic, so to speak, thus entertaining you even further.

I would go far to say that it wouldn't be a waste of money to see this on opening weekend.  The more crowded the theater, the better.

Best Parts: 1.) In the final fight, there is one sequence where the group of good guys are inside of a large building that the Decepticons smartly decide to tip over. From then on, everything that happens in and out of the building is just amazing and exciting to watch.

2.) Ken Jeong, for the brief time he is in this movie, is funny as hell. He redeems himself after a mediocre second season performance in Community, and an even worse -- in my humble opinion -- his outing in The Hangover Part II. He is side-splittingly funny in the one scene he is in.

You Can Always Count On From These Movies Above All Else (But Beneath CGI): Comedy. Michael Bay has a way with making every person in the audience laugh almost constantly. Honestly, if I could choose a movie I would like all of comedy to be like, it might possibly be these very movies. Its awesome.

Shia puts in his best comical performance yet, particularly on the physical side. Whenever there's a dry spot in the plot or a lack of pieces of metal with minds of their own, you can rely on Shia or his parents or new characters (John Malkovich, Ken Jeong) to tickle your funny bone.

Downside: The girl really has nothing to offer in this movie other than an opening shot of her rear end. Whereas Transformers was Megan Fox's breakout hit, this Victoria's Secret model will go no further.

She wasn't given much to work with, I'll give her that. It's almost like the writers didn't care, and only included her to give Sam someone to save and give the audience someone to look at after noticing that Megan Fox had left the building.

Overall Grade: B+