An Open Letter To Dirty Dog Owners

Dear Dirty Dog Owners,

The smell of spring is in the air, but it’s not my baby fresh flowers that I smell.  Oh no, it’s the smell and sight of piles of dog waste that you have left behind, refusing to clean up after your pets on your nightly walks with them.

I live in an apartment building and no one — not one single person owns a dog that lives here, yet we have to clean up your piles left by your dogs, every single day. I am sick of it.

I live in constant fear of stepping into a pile of crap and ruining my shoes, or worse, not realizing it until I go inside and track the mess all over the apartment. Is that how you live?  Do you track muck and yuck into your house and not give it a second thought?  I’m guessing you don’t, for the sheer fact that you leave it in everyone else’s yard for them to clean up so your lawn is sparkling clean.

Have you ever thought of the repercussions of your actions?  Do you realize that if I don’t clean up after you, the pet rubbish could transmit disease, harm MY health and the health of those around me, all the while degrading our neighborhood on the whole?

What if a child picks it up? What if your pet has worms or fleas, not to mention the flies it attracts?  I just brought that into my home and endangered someone’s child. How dare you put YOUR responsibility on me. How Dare You.

Last summer, my friend stopped by for a visit.  She knows I don’t own a dog so she never thought to watch her step walking into my yard.  And guess what? She stepped right into a load of muddle, ruining her expensive fitness shoes.

Now, am I responsible for that?  Am I the one who should pay for her new shoes?  I don’t think so. I’m not the one who crapped in the yard.  But it’s not her fault either.  It’s your fault, the dirty people of Dormont that will not pick up their mess and take responsibility for their pets. 

I want you to know I see every one you, since there are several offenders.  I know who you all are.  I am waiting and biding my time.  You know not to do it when I’m watching. But, do you always know when I’m looking?  Because I have a plan for when I catch you.  And you are not going to like it.  Nothing to worry your dirty little head about. I won’t be breaking any laws, like you are. But trust me that everyone will know your faces.

With most heart-felt disgust,

~ Carla