Are You Attached to Other's?

Do you ever get frustrated when you tell someone or give someone great personal/business advice/healing and they just don’t do the work like they should?

They refuse to follow through and you just KNOW that if they took your advice it would solve their problems. In your heart, you really WANT them to succeed, be happy and create whatever it is they’re wanting…. sound about right?

So how can you tell when you’ve become Energetically attached to the outcome of another person?

WANT.

It’s the key word.

When you WANT something from another person – whether it’s follow-up, a return call, for them follow through, or for them to feel better after a healing session – you have become energetically attached to that person responding in the way in which you WANT.

Some underlying vibrations that go along with attachment? Control and Responsibility. WANTING them to do something or respond in any particular fashion can hold the vibration of control.

WANTING them to have a fantastic outcome or do their work because it’ll really be beneficial to them can be related to taking personal responsiblity for those pieces.

So what’s the big deal if I WANT these things for others and become Energetically Attached to the outcome? Good question! So glad you asked it.

First, you can start to  feel the Empathic Backlash. Yes, you will start feeling all of this person’s stuff, all of their thoughts, beliefs, moods and feelings (not fun!) Plus you can pick up a litany of other energetic pieces that we won’t go into in this post. (read more about empathic sensitivity here)

You can also become….

Frustrated – because their not doing the work, following directions or following up.

Angry – when they tell you they’re not doing the work and make up some whiny excuse for not taking personal responsibility for their stuff.

Imposed on – Because now they want YOU to do all the leg work for them or give them more of your time despite the fact that they’re not doing the work.

So now you’re ATTACHED to someone who refuses to take responsiblity for their own actions and your frustration levels are through the roof. You might even slip into judgement and start-up with a thousand reasons as to why this person is… blah, blah, blah.

They Key to NOT becoming Attached to the outcome of others behaviors is ALLOWING.

Allowing them to swim in the cesspool of their own making until they can figure out how to crawl out. You certainly don’t want to swim in it with them, right?

Instead, we hold a nice little bubble of Compassion and allow them to do their thing. (More on Practicing Compassion here) It’s not your job to fish them out of their cesspool.

You may WANT them to get out of the cesspool, however, this would then re-attach you to their outcome.

WHAT IF swimming in the cesspool is the lesson they need in order to realize that they’re IN a cesspool? You don’t want to take away that discovery from them, do you? 

Now what if you’re a practitioner and you WANT your clients to have good results after their session with you? You give them all the energy work, follow-up exercises, meditations etc… and they just don’t follow through. (CESSPOOL)

Try looking at this way… What if you moved into greater trust that whatever it is that person is receiving from you is what they needed at that time… and THAT’s IT? You LET IT GO and ALLOW them to utilize that information however they need to. What they do with that information is NOT your responsibility.

Even if they say “I got nothing out of that session” you know that they got EXACTLY what they needed in that moment and  they may not be able to recognize it until months later.

So, what is the Keyword or phrase to look out for when working with your peeps?

WANT

I WANT… 

This is what I WANT for you…

The moment you hear it come out of your mouth – check yourself – are you energetically attaching to outcome or desire of what you want for that person?

Did you take personal responsiblity for creating that outcome for them?

Are you being Empathically reactive to your client because you’re energetically attached to their stuff?

**Remember… this is all happening energetically and you may not even know you’re doing it. It’s all about being Self-Aware of your own energy, where it is and who you’re attaching it to.

So I”ll invite you to keep your energetic hands to yourself… you will be much happier for it!  

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